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Red Lion

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About Red Lion

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    red-lionthe-bartender

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  1. Things that you hate! v2

    I hate this in games and when people take and post screenshots of messages and things. There's not a lot of point in having something for people to read if they can't actually read it.
  2. Work Woes

    Sup Phoenix, I just had a day and I need to get some gripes off my chest. For the past several months I've been working at a crisis center in the Special Victims Program and one of my duties involves making hospital care packages for victims of sexual assault. These packages include things like spare clothing (since clothing is often taken as evidence) hair brushes, tooth brushes, toothpaste, tissues and other sundry little things people might like to have for an overnight stay at the hospital. One thing our packages NEVER include is make-up. Particularly used makeup. Today we picked up a box from a church in the area and it was full of broken and half empty make up items. Foundation powder that had the pan showing in the bottom, lipsticks worn down to nubs, crusted mascara with hair in it and all of it was smudged and dirty. This isn't the first time we've sent out requests for donations and gotten things that were completely unusable but today it's bothering me more than it normally would. Our relationship with the local churches is kind of hit and miss, we send them letters with lists of suggested items for them to collect, we call them to see if we can arrange for our Education and Outreach team to come and speak to their youth groups or adult Sunday school classes about domestic violence and sexual assault and I'd say about HALF of churches we contact are receptive. Part of the problem stems from a conflict in values. Our center is pro LGBT and offers resources to trans and gay individuals, we work with the local Pride groups to make ourselves visible to the gay community as a source of counseling and aid. We don't ask that churches come out and openly support the gay community or participate in pride, all we want from churches is donations and to raise awareness regarding human trafficking, sexual assault and domestic abuse. Some churches are perfectly good with this. Other churches seem to be offended that we exist at all and it's not enough for them to just politely tell us "no". It seems like they always have to make an effort to be spiteful, wasting our time and then mocking us. One minister tried to bargain with us, basically saying that if we get to push our "agenda" at his church he should be allowed to come down to our support groups and spread God's word to all of the survivors there. We made sure to blacklist his church. I don't hold anything against organizations that turn us down, there are always other places we can contact and after someone declines we can move right along to the next group. But when they tell us they'll have something for us then we get broken make-up, torn clothing or cut up wigs it's hard not to read that as a direct statement of malice. This isn't exclusive to Christian organizations but that's the majority of the people doing it and it's aggravating.
  3. What's the fuck up with my neighbors and friends

    Probably a good policy never to drop any toothbrush in any sink tbh. Granted the traces of E.coli bacteria are probably still not as bad as the cocktail of veg and meat rot that tends to accumulate in the basin of a kitchen sink. Poop is super yucky but medically speaking there are actually worse things your body can come into contact with.
  4. What's the fuck up with my neighbors and friends

    I agree with Vae. it'd be one thing if you were the ONLY person using the sink but you have other people to consider. If this new guy pays as much rent as you do then it doesn't really matter who was there first. I'd also have a problem with someone brushing his teeth in the kitchen sink. A( I don't wanna have to watch you brush your teeth, gargle, and spit in the same room where I prep and eat my food. It's just plain rude tbh and B(A sink is a sink there's no reason you can't use the one in the bathroom, privately. It's also not hygienic, and I don't mean because of your germs specifically but if you were to drop your tooth brush in that sink you run the risk of getting all kinds of nasty bacteria on it and a simple rinse is not going to be enough to kill all of them. You're putting yourself at a higher risk for parasites, salmonella, or mold born infections, even if you regularly clean your sink the sheer amount of food particles that ends up in there on a daily basis makes it impossible to keep sanitary. Your bathroom sink is likely cleaner and doesn't come into contact with raw meats or rotten food, it's just more sensible to brush there.
  5. Never said it was a piece of cake, it's still an available option and a good deal easier for women who are single to make a case that the father is uninvolved. On the safe haven law thing. I think you're overestimating the efficiency and willingness of the of the system to find the parents of abandoned children. There's actually a debate going on whether the Safe Haven Laws are a violation of the father's rights. Specifically because it can be difficult for a father to find and reclaim an abandoned child. In NC and many other states the total anonymity and lack of legal ramifications mean that even if a father is actively looking for a child it is not a guarantee that he will succeed in finding it (If the child is left in another county or state his chances are extremely slim) And in NC there are no legal ramifications for a woman, married, unmarried, involved or uninvolved in a relationship if she chooses to leave her baby at a safe haven, unless signs of abuse are present. She is not required to identify herself, she is not required to name a father. It is not a crime nor is it currently considered custodial interference for her to leave her newborn at a hospital or fire station. In many states leaving your child at a safe haven relieves you of both your parental rights and legal liability. And to be honest most "reasonable attempts" In NC, and I'm sure other states, particularly in the south, to find the non surrendering parent begin and end with a brief notice in the newspaper in the county where the child was surrendered. About the same amount of effort as finding a missing dog. Again, the biggest hurdle in giving up a child is going to be to a married woman with an involved partner. Most of which aren't going to pursue either safe haven or adoption processes in the first place. https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubPDFs/safehaven.pdf only 14/50 states even require that law enforcement determine whether the baby is reported missing. It varies a lot between states but in a lot of cases effort to contact or find the father or reunite the child with the non-surrendering parent will be minimal to non-existent.
  6. Even if his name is on the certificate, he can be deemed unfit and his right to consent can be waived. The largest hurdle is in a situation where the father is present and active. Not just on the certificate, but actively supporting the mother and/or child. If a woman can convince the court that it is in the child's best interest to be adopted out then that is the decision the court will go with. Not always easy but not impossible. The long and short of it is that you seem think a named father's consent is an ironclad requirement, while I think that's not as set in stone as you're making it out to be. Also, again, if all else fails, safe haven laws. If a woman really wants to give up her kid there are places she can leave it without giving her own identity.
  7. https://parkerherringlawgroup.com/adoption/adoption-without-fathers-consent-north-carolina/ If a father is uninvolved or not deemed "supportive" his consent is usually not needed. He also doesn't necessarily even have to be aware of the pregnancy. A woman has to answer truthfully IF HE DIRECTLY ASKS, but if he's not present in the mother's life and not in contact with the mother then she usually won't be required to seek him out. https://www2.ncdhhs.gov/info/olm/manuals/dss/csm-50/man/CSs1302-01.htm Here in NC a potential father sometimes has to PROVE that he is a capable and willing parent before he is given the right to prevent an adoption. Depending on the judge and the county that can be extremely difficult for an unwed father. He usually has to meet a certain financial and criminal standard (again depending on the judge and district) before his consent is deemed necessary. Yes, there is a lot of technical legal bullshit but there are also a lot of ways around getting a father's consent and they aren't as hard as people think. Or if you wanna skip all the legal hoops you can literally just dump the kid http://safehaven.tv/states/northcarolina/ Heck you can drop it off with ANY RESPONSIBLE ADULT and that adult can take the child to the nearest hospital or police station. The crisis center where I started working is a safe haven. A woman can leave a newborn there, no questions asked.
  8. Shower Thoughts

    If the pulp of a fruit can be considered the "meat" does that mean the juice is like blood? Are we fruit vampires?
  9. Things That You Don't Understand!

    Why people feel the need to make vague posts about bullshit going on in their personal lives. As opposed to actually discussing it or keeping it private, they go the route of doing a halfway thing that defeats the purpose of either. They're not gonna air out their dirty laundry but they're gonna make sure everyone knows "someone" shit the sheets last night.
  10. Honestly women have plenty of alternatives when it comes to dealing with unwanted pregnancies, including giving up the child for adoption. Regardless of personal sentiments of morality I don't see any real reason why the father shouldn't have the same options.
  11. Artist gripes

    It might deter some of them at least. *shrug* it's worth a shot.
  12. Artist gripes

    Usually I just block them. I used to reply to them directly but I no longer have the interest in starting an argument with these entitled shits or the people who come to their defense. if it gets particularly bad I turn anon off for awhile. That usually stops it. The hilarious part is that these messages started appearing after I told another Anon that won't do ships involving real people. I had just posted a list of art I won't make and apparently some people found it to be an unreasonable list and a few of them pointed out specifically "Celebs/real people" and "Shipping minors with adults." "Hardcore NSFW is out. I try to keep the content on this blog pg-pg13ish Anything related to an anime is out. Ships featuring underage characters with adult characters. Out Ships I don’t care for like “Kylo Ren x Rey” are out. I will let you know if your suggestion falls into that category. Anything that sexualizes minors. Out Ships involving celebrities or any real people. Out Art that involves an excessive amount of teal. I know that one is weird but I find teal to be not just an unpleasant color, but an unpleasant experience. " Everyone is strangely ok with teal being on the list tho. That's the one I would totally give them for finding unreasonable but no. Adults with minors and real people, that's what they're dying to get art of. I got an anon trying to tell me why student age Harry Potter x Snape isn't unhealthy and should be considered an exception.
  13. Artist gripes

    Just blowing off some steam, not anything major. As a hobby I make art and while it's not amazing art, I do get requests and have watchers on Deviant Art, Tumblr, and FA. Things usually go pretty smoothly but every now and then I'll get messages demanding certain types of content. When these messages come in the form of a legitimate request I don't find them too troublesome, I tend to just politely decline and go about my business. But then there's this: Among other messages off the same type. "Please, sir, I'm but a poor, broke, mentally ill person and I want to see art of my m/m Harry Potter ocs. I want it a lot and it would be really nice of you to just give it too me!" "Artists should make things for free because art should be available to everyone!!!" "Gimme free shit because that's what Jesus would do!" Gets on my damn nerves >8[
  14. Thoughts on gay cake case in front of SCOTUS

    I think this is a case where the context really matters. The entire United States is covered by the Federal Civil Rights Act of 1964, which prohibits discrimination by privately owned places of public accommodation on the basis of ethnicity, nationality or religion and I think sexual orientation and gender expression need to be added to this list. However, there is a difference between a bakery saying "We don't sell to gays at all" vs "We don't make x kind of wedding cake here." if someone owns a private business I think they should maintain the right to say the latter, but not the former. Which is to say that they should maintain the right to decide specifically what products and themes they choose to make/sell. I don't see the benefit in forcing a Christian establishment to make a wedding cake for non-Christian weddings. I would also say that if the establishment were Jewish, Muslim, or otherwise then it would be unethical to force them to make cakes for Christian weddings. If an establishment specifically made LG wedding cakes I would not want a law forcing them to cater to straight weddings. Their business, their money. Realistically speaking, I don't see why you would refuse to make anybody a wedding cake. You could make a very generic cake and have the couple buy their own topper separately, but allowing businesses to have some level of freedom means that a few of them will use that freedom to be assholes. As long as they can only be assholes on a private level I don't really care too much.
  15. Toxic Victim Mentalities

    Yes, I wasn't trying to imply that they can't. Though I don't always require romance in a partnership. To clarify, most of my het relationships have treated the two like they were separate entities. Friendship is what you have with your buddies and romance is what you have with your SO. My queer relationships have been a lot more chill though they felt less conventionally "romantic". There was no emphasis on anniversaries, dating norms, gender roles and other things I had assumed didn't actually matter but mattered a lot to my straight partners.
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