Search the Community

Why do I keep doing guard and involving myself in the marching band and winterguard world? I'm not even a music student because I'm a terrible musician. The last time I did marching was with Texas A&M Commerce in 2015, for guard, a show that, while great, didn't seem as amazing compared to their 2014 and 2016 shows. I never did guard in high school, and compared to other people my age (20s), I'm not even that great at guard. I've never been part of a winterguard, there's no guard close to my hometown, and the four guards I actually would LIKE to be a part of (CGT Dallas, CGT Fort Worth, Lake Area Independent, and Spintronix), are all too far away, with the CGT's being the closest at two-three hours away for a non-driving student. Even if I was, I wouldn't have the money for it, which is why I wasn't able to perform with Commerce in 2016. Don't even get me started on wanting to do DCI. And so I keep asking myself, why do I keep spinning? Mostly, I guess, because I love it. Even if I can't perform, it's still a hobby to do, and I would like to teach at my old high school one day if I can. tl;dr : I watched TAMUC's 2016 show finally after avoiding it and I feel depressed because it's so amazing and I could've been a part of it but I wasn't able to because I'm poor.