AshleyAshes Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 My office is full of immigrants and I can't stand it. Even the guy who interviewed me had only been in this country for less than a year. I mean, I get it, I get why they come here, escaping a nation of violence, political strife and 15 years of non-stop military conflict but this isn't where they belong! Their jobs no longer exist in their country so they came to my country, they are taking jobs that could be filled by people from my own country! The guy who works near my desk was telling me about how much money he saves because his wife us getting to use our healthcare system! My taxes paid for his wife's healthcare and they aren't even citizens! They celebrate some of our holidays but other holidays are at the wrong time of the year! The government gives tax benefits just to bring these people into my country!That's right, you understood me: My Canadian workplace is full of Americans! Yankee Go Home!Those people are filling this country with their people and culture. They are displacing proper Canadian culture! Their Ethnic restraints are everywhere! There's literally there different Starbucks carrying ethnic food from America within four blocks of work! They should confirm to our culture and enjoy Tim Hortons and if they want their ethnic food so bad, they can go back to where they came from! I see Americans on TV all the time on Canadian TV channels! Our news stations covers the American election more than the Canadian election in a clear attempt to cater to non-Canadian residents! I have this suspicion that Americans might control the media even! I can't prove it, but I think I can soon! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brass Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 Everywhere belongs to America. Get out. Also: marry me so I can become citizen 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Conker Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 Eh. 5/10. I mean, I get it, and it's funny in theory, but I'm not laughing and i'm pretty drunk and am currently laughing at everything. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AshleyAshes Posted November 14, 2015 Author Share Posted November 14, 2015 Eh. 5/10. I mean, I get it, and it's funny in theory, but I'm not laughing and i'm pretty drunk and am currently laughing at everything.But my workplace really, actually is like 50% Americans on foreign worker visas. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vallium Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 (edited) Deport them...or blow them upOh oops, tl;dr, boy is that awkward with that plot twist in the middle. How is that for irony? Edited November 14, 2015 by WolfNightV4X1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AshleyAshes Posted November 14, 2015 Author Share Posted November 14, 2015 Deport them...or blow them upI'm afraid of them. They could be religious extremists. I see them on American news, all 'Jesus This' and 'Bible That'. They worship a text that is nothing but murder, violence and religious retribution! Those people want some kind of 'Biblical Law' to control the land rather than a secular legal system! They have guns and are want to take on the government, organizing into armed cells they call 'Militias' to prepare for government conflict! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phausk Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 To be fair, American politics are much more entertaining than Canadian politics. Herman Cain? Rick Perry? Donald Trump? It's great! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spot Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 Canada explainsWhy would you want to go to Canada anyway, their wheels are square. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zeke Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 To be fair, American politics are much more entertaining than Canadian politics. Herman Cain? Rick Perry? Donald Trump? It's great!Herman "Sugar Daddy" Cain, mind you. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zytan Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 Live in England for a few years and then come crying back to me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AshleyAshes Posted November 14, 2015 Author Share Posted November 14, 2015 Live in England for a few years and then come crying back to me.How many Americans have infested England?! D: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brass Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 How many Americans have infested England?! D:You mean fancy America 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zeke Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 Americans are nothing but a scourge of fat and Jesus. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zytan Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 How many Americans have infested England?! D:Eh, not too many, I meant immigrants in general... I think our slang puts Yanks off of living here Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zeke Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 Eh, not too many, I meant immigrants in general... I think our slang puts Yanks off of living here That and your food isn't saturated in artificial colors and corn syrup. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AshleyAshes Posted November 14, 2015 Author Share Posted November 14, 2015 Eh, not too many, I meant immigrants in general... I think our slang puts Yanks off of living here Then your post makes no sense. If anything, going to England would mean getting AWAY from American Immigrants! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zytan Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 Then your post makes no sense. If anything, going to England would mean getting AWAY from American Immigrants!It makes about as much sense as the title not being more specific; I took it to mean other cultures in general in your workplace and you using Yanks as your example. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AshleyAshes Posted November 14, 2015 Author Share Posted November 14, 2015 It makes about as much sense as the title not being more specific; I took it to mean other cultures in general in your workplace and you using Yanks as your example.So the satire just went straight over your head, huh? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zytan Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 So the satire just went straight over your head, huh?Oh the irony, must've done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sourdough Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 My department had to co-ordinate with an English group and an American group for one project. Oh my God, the tool on the American team. That's when I learned American's can talk forever without actually saying anything.Ban the Yanks, keep our brevity pure. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Butters Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 Eh, not too many, I meant immigrants in general... I think our slang puts Yanks off of living here Not so! It's fun learning what a chav is and what going for a cheeky (insert food place here) means. :3 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Doggo Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 Not so! It's fun learning what a chav is and what going for a cheeky (insert food place here) means. :3 Been for a cheeky Nando's yet?I've only been there once but I remember enjoy it, years ago. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zytan Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 Not so! It's fun learning what a chav is and what going for a cheeky (insert food place here) means. :3 Hahaha Although to be fair it should be shav these days, it's no longer council housing... social housing, seriously why did they bother changing it 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Butters Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 Been for a cheeky Nando's yet?I've only been there once but I remember enjoy it, years ago.Almost but it really looked very low quality. I did use its bathroom though. Also, it's kinda weird hearing fag all the time here and for it not to mean homosexual. Lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PastryOfApathy Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 (edited) My department had to co-ordinate with an English group and an American group for one project. Oh my God, the tool on the American team. That's when I learned American's can talk forever without actually saying anything.Ban the Yanks, keep our brevity pure.Bitch don't go talking about brevity. We're not the ones adding extra 'u's to every fucking word.#removelimeyscum Edited November 14, 2015 by PastryOfApathy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sourdough Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 On 14/11/2015 at 9:15 PM, PastryOfApathy said: Bitch don't go talking about brevity. We're not the ones adding extra 'u's to every fucking word. #removelimeyscum It was odd though. The English members of the group were as succinct as our boys, but they were almost apologetic about it. The Americans liked to use big words. It should not take one minute to say 'Yes, I agree'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PastryOfApathy Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 How dare you, I am West Limey.It was odd though. The English members of the group were as succinct as our boys, but they were almost apologetic about it. The Americans liked to use big words. It should not take one minute to say 'Yes, I agree'.God's Country: Inches / Miles / PoundsFilthy Euro Scum: "Centimeters" / "Kilometers" / "Kilograms"Disgusting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisek Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 God's Country: Inches / Miles / PoundsFilthy Euro Scum: "Centimeters" / "Kilometers" / "Kilograms"Disgusting.Yeah, honestly. Kill-o-gram? It sounds like a singing telegram but the song is sung by bullets instead. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AshleyAshes Posted November 14, 2015 Author Share Posted November 14, 2015 God's Country: Inches / Miles / PoundsFilthy Euro Scum: "Centimeters" / "Kilometers" / "Kilograms"I'm sure that every American kid in math class LOVED trying to do unit conversions in a non-base10 system. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sourdough Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 On 14/11/2015 at 9:30 PM, PastryOfApathy said: God's Country: Inches / Miles / Pounds Filthy Euro Scum: "Centimeters" / "Kilometers" / "Kilograms" Disgusting. My faith is rising to boiling point. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PastryOfApathy Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 My faith is rising to boiling point, as well as my begorrah.Sorry I can't hear you, the crinkling of my bag of freedom fries is too loud. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisek Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 I'm sure that every American kid in math class LOVED trying to do unit conversions in a non-base10 system. It wasn't as much "conversions" as "memorize these arbitrary values with no basis in logic". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zytan Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 Bitch don't go talking about brevity. We're not the ones adding extra 'u's to every fucking word.#removelimeyscumNo you're the ones taking them out Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phausk Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 Sorry I can't hear you, the crinkling of my bag of freedom fries is too loud.Freedom fries still makes me laugh to this day. Almost as bad as "pizza is a vegetable" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hakar-Kerarmor Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 Ban the Yanks, keep our brevity pure.Aye. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sourdough Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 Aye.My brother. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hakar-Kerarmor Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 My brother.My kin. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Käpt'n Posted November 16, 2015 Share Posted November 16, 2015 I'm afraid of them. They could be religious extremists. I love this thread, nicely done! :3Also, isn't Canada mostly empty anyway? Are you afraid they are gonna steal all your snow or something? :V 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eggdodger Posted November 19, 2015 Share Posted November 19, 2015 OP, why doesn't Canada just build a wall to keep us out?#makecanadagreatagain 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wrecker Posted November 19, 2015 Share Posted November 19, 2015 (edited) why is it that we're a part of america, yet people from the states have the exclusive rights to be called an 'american...' you're from north-america, we're way more north than you, and we burnt down your fucking whitehouse! WE ARE AMERICA.just kidding, though, love you all. Edited November 19, 2015 by Wrecker Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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