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Name Your Price


DrGravitas
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Oooooof. That's hard. I love food, wine, beer, and somehow, I think sex would be less fun, as well. Providing it was a painless loss, I'd take $250 million, after taxes.

Live forever in a world of LARPing that only deals with the Twilight series. ( and LARP, you must!)

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The opportunity to run around beating the shit out of whiny sparkly vampire wannabes with a rubber sword?! Sign me up!

Ahem. "Your time of doom is upon you Edward Cullens - all thirty of you - or should that be Edwards Cullen? I don't know. Anyhoo, I'm'a gonna stake you now so put your shirts back on, I don't want to get sparkly blood everywhere."

____

Sooooo... how much would it take for you to illustrate a complete book for me? Say between 50 and 100 images, some with multiple characters, some with detailed backgrounds, some with NSFW details.

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Have Papa Smurf give me a blowjob first? This is a hard one. But maybe that would give me immunity.

Be transformed into a baboon for a month, and be put in a zoo, only to be transformed back, and find yourself in the baboon exhibit, surrounded by baboons?

 

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All of his money and assets, guaranteed anonymity and the legal right to blow his brains out afterwards. Also I get to be on top and he has to wear a bag over his head.

Be a stand-up comedian for five shows at a maximum security penitentiary full of serious badass criminals.

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  • 2 weeks later...
15 hours ago, Feelwell the Rabbit said:

Cure for any and all diseases contracted, fifty-thousand dollars (Because money is cool), a fursuit (a very good one of my choice of design) and I get to keep the suit.

Wow, that's pretty reasonable! 

(Ya for got to ask a question, though, so I'll ask another)

What's your price for getting your leg humped by an eager otter?

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2 hours ago, Fossa-Boy said:

Wow, that's pretty reasonable! 

(Ya for got to ask a question, though, so I'll ask another)

What's your price for getting your leg humped by an eager otter?

Oh, whoops. This is what I get for posting in the morning.

Nothing. Except maybe, guaranteed not to be attacked by said owner of otter I guess?

It'd be cute, I'd pet the little guy.

 

What is your price for destroying the entire human race?

And living with the empty world afterwards.

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OMG, I love to talk; this would be horrible. I'd say $20 million.

Get sprayed by a skunk every time you did anything yiffy, by yourself or with others: One would just happen by and spray you, tight in the midst of things.

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On 7/28/2016 at 10:37 AM, DrGravitas said:

$90 million, a comfortable face-mask capable of protecting my nose, mouth, and eyes, and an endless supply of tomato juice. 

Stick your tongue in a live electrical socket.

Huh, I did get a finger shocked by one, and once peed on an electric fence, on accident...so maybe this would be quite so bad, assuming standard US 120 volt outlets. But still, it'd take a lot of nerve...I'd do it for $10 million, plus tongue repairs, if any.

Wear hot pink lipstick and sparkly blue eye-shadow for the rest of your life.

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Full medical attention afterwards paid for by the band, a visit from them in hospital where we can chat about random stuff and $10000.

Punch a cat in the face and then let the Cat retaliate on you. Oh and the Cat is a Lion.

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A suit of armor, some juicy steaks to lure said cat away, and $1 million. Mainly, I'd feel bad about punching the poor lion-kitty!

Be a door to door salesperson for Bad Dragon toys, in a small, conservative city in the deep south, and knock on every door in town, showing them your samples?

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$60,000 annual salary + standard benefits and sales commissions, 15 days vacation per year, annual pay adjustment for inflation, a 50% discount on most company products, and a reality TV cameraman to (hopefully) keep the locals polite.

Throw a used (by you) condom at Vladimir Putin during a political rally while surrounded by Russian Ultra-Nationalists.

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 8/15/2016 at 9:17 AM, DrGravitas said:

Roll around in powdered sugar then sit down, naked, on a hive of fire ants for 3 minutes.

 

Transform me into a Giant South American Anteater, and I'll consider it dinner. Maybe some wine to go with it. What goes well with fire ants? I should think a nice Sauvignon Blanc, for contrast.

Dress up in a rubber Gecko outfit, and ride around the NYC subway system for 2 hours during rush hour, munching on a bag of live crickets. (Must eat at least 20 crickets)

 

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I'd walk one naked, so long as it didn't cause any legal trouble on live TV for $50,000. Plus, a lifetime supply of those toe shoes...oddly, I kinda like them!

Go to a Star Wars convention, and run around with glittery, metallic spray paint in gold and silver, getting every storm-trooper in sight, and then, trying to escape.

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Well, it beats working. I'd do it for $50,000 a year, clothes, hair cuts, dye and razors included.

Dress up like a giant Zika virus plushie, for an entire year, and wear said suit at all times when in public, and a minimum of 12 hours a day:

zika.jpg

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Fair share in all the proceeds, a guaranteed mainstream record deal, and a really fucking good costume. Keep in mind though that I can only play the theremin.

Eat a really messy and smelly tuna-garlic-mayonnaise sandwich, with your mouth open, whilst reciting the pledge of allegiance, in front of someone you really, really love / fancy / lust after so they get covered in foody bits.

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Well, @Cap'n Crosseye is my fiancé and we already have seen some nasty stuff of eachother. I think *he'd* eat it because thats more his thing, and we'd do it anywhere from 5 grand and up hahaha. I mean if its cooked right that doesn't sound too bad. Get Sourdough, a bit of grilled tuna, and mix garlic in with a bit of cilantro mayo. 

Show your internet history to your parents. 

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I use private browsing, so $300 after restarting the browser, $60,000 without restarting, and $9,000,000 if they're allowed to see the open windows before or after I get the history.

Buy a sex toy of your choice and email a copy of the receipt and a picture of you holding it to your entire contacts list as well as post the same content to any social media account you have. (You get to keep the sex toy or return it for full credit.)

 

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16 hours ago, LazerMaster5 said:

Full ownership of all adult shops in the state of Ohio.

Good luck prying the Chamber/The garden from that guys cold, clammy and sticky hands, lmao. 

skip me, but if ur lazy, wear a maid outfit in public. The sexy kind. 

 

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Ok, I would punch a cop in the face in a public place while wearing a sexy maid outfit for $10,000,000. But it has to be a British cop, since they're not allowed to Taze, pistol whip or shoot you. Also, I'd like to wear a pair of fake plastic Hulk Hands while doing it, just because.

Sooooo what would it take for you to join a manned mission to Mars? (Keep in mind you'll be in space with a lot of boring nerdy astronauts for years and the only entertainment they have on board is a Scrabble board with half the tiles missing!)

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