Fossa Posted June 8, 2017 Share Posted June 8, 2017 Granted! You are now bursting with energy, and have the combined skills of every celebrity chef on The Food Network; however, you develop a rare disease in which your mouth must be permanently wired shut, and must now intake all your nutrients via an IV, unable to taste them. But to your friends, you're an amazing chef, and they help raise the money to buy you a restaurant which is quickly awarded three Michelin stars. You say, "mmmmf', to thank them. I wish all of the world's land mass was one huge tropical forests, no more fields, no more cities, and that Fossas were the boss, and with me as Boss Fossa. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lopaw Posted June 8, 2017 Share Posted June 8, 2017 Granted, the global jungle you wanted works fine until a fire breaks out, with no treeless areas to act as a firebreak and contain things the entire forest burns down. I wish I had a fossa as a pet. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faust Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 Granted. It's @Fossa. Nuff said. I wish for a hanged parliament instead of a hung one. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snagged Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 Granted. Every day, your pet werewolf transforms into a boring human who really likes to make a mess in your place of living. I wish something exciting happened to me every night Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrazyTundraWolf Posted June 12, 2017 Share Posted June 12, 2017 Granted, every night you are chased through the woods by a person in a full fur suit wielding a baseball bat. I wish I could fly at will 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faust Posted June 12, 2017 Share Posted June 12, 2017 Granted. Captain Riker quickly gets sick of you flying at him and phasers you mercilessly. I wish I could invent a brand new form of super-immersive VR that doesn't make people feel sick and make a fortune selling it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lopaw Posted June 13, 2017 Share Posted June 13, 2017 Granted, however it is such a pain for people to make software that works with it that very little titles are made for the system. Whist you make a fortune on it the failure of it to sell loads wipes out 95% of your profits. I wish there where more hours in the day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caledonian Posted June 13, 2017 Share Posted June 13, 2017 Granted. All the hours are significantly shorter though. I wish i could find my true calling Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snagged Posted June 13, 2017 Share Posted June 13, 2017 Granted. It's a sewer worker. I wish shooting stars actually granted wishes if you see them 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fossa Posted June 13, 2017 Share Posted June 13, 2017 Granted! Sadly, due to rising carbon and sulfur dioxide emissions, nobody on the earth ever sees them anymore, and thus, no wishes are granted. Also, everyone dies. (except ants, for some reason) I wish I was a Space-Fossa, in my invincible Fossa space-suit, bouncing around in my special lunar jungle. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faust Posted June 14, 2017 Share Posted June 14, 2017 17 hours ago, Snagged said: Granted. It's a sewer worker. That is EXACTLY what I was going to post, but I thought better of it because I didn't want to hog all the good ones (skip this) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lopaw Posted June 15, 2017 Share Posted June 15, 2017 On 13/06/2017 at 9:33 PM, Fossa said: Granted! Sadly, due to rising carbon and sulfur dioxide emissions, nobody on the earth ever sees them anymore, and thus, no wishes are granted. Also, everyone dies. (except ants, for some reason) I wish I was a Space-Fossa, in my invincible Fossa space-suit, bouncing around in my special lunar jungle. Granted, it works until you bounce so hard you break the glass dome containing your lunar jungle and cause it to undergo explosive decompression, wreaking all the trees. I wish I had a ferret trained to run cables through small conduits like what NASA has used for doing wiring for launchpads Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snagged Posted June 15, 2017 Share Posted June 15, 2017 Granted. You ferret now demands an unreasonable promotion and a rise of wage because it's a smart ferret. I wish I could juggle things Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Data Posted June 16, 2017 Share Posted June 16, 2017 Granted, you now have to juggle your social life, your job, and three hair trigger loaded shotguns. I wish I had tesla's research papers Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faust Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 Granted! Elon Musk sues you for industrial espionage. I wish I could control frogs using simple somatic gestures. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fossa Posted August 20, 2017 Share Posted August 20, 2017 Granted! But because I'm not sure what one is, you become a star wars Princess Leah action figure, that some boys pretending to be Darth Vader blow apart with firecrackers, sometime in the 1970s. I wish that I could kiss a frog that would give me riches, longevity and fame. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarkShark Posted August 23, 2017 Share Posted August 23, 2017 Granted! However, you turn into a frog yourself. You are now rich in protein, it takes awhile to prepare your dish, and people all over the US hear about how good your legs taste. Riches, longevity, and fame. I wish I had seen the full eclipse Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
U-235 Posted August 23, 2017 Share Posted August 23, 2017 Wish granted, however you saw it from the perspective of the moon, and therefore were transported to the moon, where your promptly died as a result of being exposed to space. I wish I had my own nuclear reactor! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faust Posted August 24, 2017 Share Posted August 24, 2017 Granted! Velcome to Chernobyl, Comrade U-235! I wish that pigeons were extremely healthy and carried no diseases. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
U-235 Posted August 24, 2017 Share Posted August 24, 2017 In order to do that we had to irradiate them to kill off the disease. However they ended up mutating and becoming GIANT ZOMBIE MUTANT PIGEONS And promptly took over the world. Welcome to your new post-apocalypse! I wish I had a GPA that was above a 3.0 while still remaining a Nuclear Engineering major. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Feelwell Posted August 25, 2017 Share Posted August 25, 2017 Granted. You're so smart that you're kidnapped by the military to work on secret government projects involving nuclear power, which are then used to cull millions of masses, including the people of your hometown. I wish I was more relaxed. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faust Posted August 25, 2017 Share Posted August 25, 2017 Granted! You are now narcoleptic. Every time you get even a teensy bit excited you fall fast asleep. I wish for a funky face mask to wear while robbing banks at halloween parties. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarkShark Posted August 26, 2017 Share Posted August 26, 2017 Granted, however it's a cheap dollar store Iron Man mask for kids. Anywhere you go Spiderman will sneak up and proceed to web you in the face while trying to dodge a gravity gun. I wish it were easier to please people 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jtrekkie Posted September 1, 2017 Share Posted September 1, 2017 Granted. Pleasing people is now a breeze. They all see how good a job you do, though, and hound you day and night with odd jobs and favors that only take you moments to finish. You have no peace, but you frantically seek out new tasks because your simple toil is the only thing that keeps you from dwelling on the fact that the only person you are unable to please is yourself. I wish I was more fun. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LazerMaster5 Posted September 11, 2017 Share Posted September 11, 2017 Granted, but now everyone wants to spend every last second with you, leaving you no freetime or privacy. I wish I was having better luck with my job search. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Data Posted September 13, 2017 Share Posted September 13, 2017 Granted but now you are so busy from your success you no longer have free time and have to leave behind everything you hold dear I wish that I had my optimism back Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faust Posted September 14, 2017 Share Posted September 14, 2017 Granted! It is, however, entirely unwarranted. I wish to be the most awesomest player on Destiny 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snagged Posted September 14, 2017 Share Posted September 14, 2017 Granted but Destiny 2 is a terrible game to play and will be riddled with bugs I wish for a better internet Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faust Posted September 15, 2017 Share Posted September 15, 2017 Granted, but the definition of 'better' is given by a super-strict Islamic Imam, so the Internet now contains nothing but a plain text version of the Koran and a recording of a Muezzin calling the faithful to prayer goes off very loudly in your earhole every morning at daybreak. (If this offends any super-strict Muslims, I can only say: what are you doing looking at this sinful page in the first place?!) I wish I was immune to fatwahs. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fossa Posted September 18, 2017 Share Posted September 18, 2017 Granted! But you are not immune to issuing them, and not understanding the language of your followers, end up issuing one calling for the (slow) death of all bats. I wish I owned a chain of highly successful, tacky, cheap colorful clothing stores called, ''Burka Barn". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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