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Depression is a terrible thing...

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It's one of the worst things to see, is someone you care about, or someone who would otherwise seem to be an outstanding figure, be torn apart day by day in the most disturbing way.

Nothing about it is physical, a blind disease, eating at someone from the inside, and you can only watch that shell of a person screaming on the inside, while otherwise seeming fine to the naked public eye.

It's heartwrenching and toxic, and I'd be lying if I said I understand how it feels. I dont. I only have a sheer outside understanding and knowledge of what's in the mind of an ill-fated person, of what struggles and pitfalls lie behind the mind's eye. All of which I could have just as well once been ignorant to...had I not had the secondhand experiences to watch, and the resources to know about and get a glimpse of what it is.

It's the hardest thing to help someone with these feelings cope with day to day life. Just what can you do or say? I absolutely hate the "typical" response, "You have nothing to be sad about", "It will pass", "It will be okay/it will get better". Times like these, I dont bother telling the oblivious truths or spouting woeful optimisms that sound trite and useless, I tell a truth...I find something I believe to be true, and tell it, sometimes it isnt much, but I believe in realism more than flightly optimisms. It's still hard though, how can you tell someone they shouldnt go when you see them suffer? Sometimes I almost wish to see their suffering end, but I never condone the final way out under any circumstances, as much as I understand the final decision should it come to be.

Just how can you help keep them afloat when they are almost always sinking? When everything seems to not work and there isnt much left, but you suffer day in and day out and maybe some change will come?  It's hard to talk to people in these states of minds,  they dwell in negativity and strife. They seem to miss or undermine details of positivity that are important factors to consider. In their mindset nothing is accomplished or nothing is good, but where I stand in my perspective I see so much more to them, something that they surely must be blind to, are they blind, or am I?

 

I dont have the answer. Countless friends, family, peers, companions struggle with this toxic condition and its hard to see them drowning in their own skin. I only wish I can transfer them some of my mental state, some of my boundless energy I seem to have, and give them some stability in life. I believe everyone has so many different routes and options, both in life and death, and its their choosing in the paths to take, I can only guide their actions, rather then make it for them. 

It is my hope that someday these people find their peace, wherever it may lie, and the struggle before made them stronger, and that theyve come farther than they realized.

 

 

....that's it, hugs to all of you who feel weak, lost, and helpless. I send my regards.

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Depression truly is a terrible thing. Whilst I didn't stay in that state for long, the time spent there is the most excrutuating and terrible there is.

I don't know how much right that gives me, or useful for that matter, to talk about it.

Stupid as it is, what kept me depressed was not seeing the value of my life nor how to go forward. Just that state of mind alone keeps you demotivated in such a way you will not develop in any way except downwards.

What didn't help is people that try to help but don't understand the problems you have, or your personal values for that matter.

What did help is that there are people in the nearby vicinity that see you suffer, want to do something about it and actually know you and your motives, personality, etc.

What gets you out of it is different for everybody, but for me it were the very things that made me who I am. That let me know that I had skills and a personality, not just a hollow shell capable of only existing. Compliments from valued people gave an extra boost though!

At least 10 million kudos to you sir, that you see the depression and want to do something about it. There's always more ways then one to go forward, and eventally get to the place they need to be happy, or at least see where they need to be to be happy.

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9 minutes ago, WolfNightV4X1 said:

"It will be okay".

 


This phrase, or maybe "you will be ok" is good when meant earnestly and from the right person. At least for me. It won't bring anyone out of a bout of depression, and if anyone has ever tried to think of what to say to someone suffering in that way, there's really nothing. Reminding them of things they like or trying to give hope doesn't hurt, but it won't make them happy, nor will trying to engage them. A least not for long, anyway. When you're depressed things won't make you happy because you just can't care.

Still, it is comforting to have a faithful person that seems to be convinced you'll be well. Not someone saccharine, but a friend with a lot of patience. When you run out of strength you can lean a little on that.

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"focus on the positives"

"you're just overthinking things"

"it gets better"

"the past is in the past"

"other people have it worse"

"you don't even have anything to complain about"

"everyone has bad days"

 

...well, they say laughter is the best medicine.

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2 minutes ago, Gator said:

 

"other people have it worse"

...well, they say laughter is the best medicine.

That one I absolutely despise, mainly because just because someone isnt suffering as bad as The Starving Child In Africa™  doesnt mean their problems arent valid and that they dont have the right to feel like shit in their own mind...especially considering a lot of those who have depression lead otherwise well lives with little or no foreseen trauma, it isnt about the external suffering at all.

 

...its something a lot of people are ignorant about, I try not to be.

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40 minutes ago, Jtrekkie said:


This phrase, or maybe "you will be ok" is good when meant earnestly and from the right person. At least for me. It won't bring anyone out of a bout of depression, and if anyone has ever tried to think of what to say to someone suffering in that way, there's really nothing. Reminding them of things they like or trying to give hope doesn't hurt, but it won't make them happy, nor will trying to engage them. A least not for long, anyway. When you're depressed things won't make you happy because you just can't care.

Still, it is comforting to have a faithful person that seems to be convinced you'll be well. Not someone saccharine, but a friend with a lot of patience. When you run out of strength you can lean a little on that.

Well, I suppose I hadnt quite meant "You'll be okay/things will be better" as a faulty phrase generally speaking, it definitely means well coming from the right person who knows your situation rather than any old person.

Truth is I dont use this much depending on the context, because most of the big picture I cant see things being okay, mainly a lifelong struggle or battle. In some small instances though, I will often say things will be better or things will be okay, as sometimes the sufferer tends to exaggerate a small scale event. If I can more easily judge a situation I try to choose the best words that will fit, and try to avoid placations.

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A lot of people who make naive but sincere attempts to help get a bitter reception or are openly mocked. This is not going to ameliorate the situation.

 

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Well the "Drowning in their own skin" sentence created a rather disturbing mental image.

I'm with Jere though, reassurance depends as much, if not more than, on how you say it than what you say.

 

Just, don't let it get you down too, because it's not helping anyone.

But it's quite kind of you to help, and be honest. A lot of people just get exapserated and say "fuckit".

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The best (non-invasive) cures I know for depression is proactivity.

If you can, identify what is wrong and do something about it.
If you can't, find something else to do and concentrate on that for a while.
If all else fails, exercise. Physical exertion triggers the release of endorphins in the brain. It also promotes a healthy self-image.

If none of these suggestions help, it might be time to pursue a medical solution.

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Thank you for sharing your story and experiences with us. I've been through this before, so I know what you're talking about. Depression is a really disgusting and scary thing that you need to get rid of as soon as possible before it completely engulfs you. Personally, I coped with this condition only due to the fact that I started looking for a cure in time, which is why I found the best place to buy kratom. This really helped me a lot, the anxiety went away, and with it the depression, which I am very happy about.

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On 1/24/2021 at 4:59 AM, Fergall said:

Thank you for sharing your story and experiences with us. I've been through this before, so I know what you're talking about. Depression is a really disgusting and scary thing that you need to get rid of as soon as possible before it completely engulfs you. Personally, I coped with this condition only due to the fact that I started looking for a cure in time, which is why I found the best place to buy kratom. This really helped me a lot, the anxiety went away, and with it the depression, which I am very happy about.

When the cure hits e828138.png.99e4c1cfa9048d760c681635f875f6b4.png

 

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6 hours ago, toticwayllum1991 said:

what are your ways to overcome depression?

Hard liquor.

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