And it grows worse

[Nova]

Even though I visited a psychlogist my insecuritis get worse.

When i walk past people i turn face so that i dont look into their face.

In the subway it gets worse, i constantly look at my phone or newspaper so that i dont look at their faces.

When i walk near many people i still walk cramped up like a fag and i have the feeling they all look at me and I have the feeling too that they think that i would steal something from their bags because I am black.

At this rate i am gonna moveout of town when i am capable of earning money.

The only things that calms me ate my videogames

I have no idea if it vanishes when i get adult.

[Vallium]

Judging from your past threads I imagine youre insecurities are well warranted

I tend to be the same way since Im anxious in public, the only way to work against that is to actively do so. In a way Ive sometimes challenged myself by doing small things on a regular basis. Try to maintain eye contact with someone long enough to know their eyecolor, say hi to a random stranger, exercise your smile muscles, strike a short compliment or chat with someone you will never see again (if you say something dumb it wont matter, theyll forget you)

It sucks but you can try. Good luck

[KookyFox]

I used to feel that way as a kid, back when I was in middle shool and early high-school. And then  don't know, I guess something clicked in my brain and I went "fuck it" and just stopped giving a fuck about people's looks nd opinion of me. I'm now notorious for going up to complete stragers and engaging conversations with them, dressing extravagantly, acting weird, being highly expressive.

I'm at the point here I wouldn't mind shouting random words and slurs in the street just for the fun of it.
So I guess that's my advice? Trying out the "fuck it" method?

[Troj]

Have you been honest with your psychologist about this? Do you feel you can be honest with them?

Sounds like you have some growing social anxiety to me.

[Nova]

Actually i was at the psychologist only because they tested me  because of my insecurity.

But well

I told my parents about social aniexty bit apparently they dont understand what it is.

I had as little child never that problem.

I drove with the subway always into the inner city to my primary school and also never had aniexty but now.

May i had somekind of trauma.

[FlynnCoyote]

Anxiety sometimes does seem to come out of nowhere. Usually you will be able to narrow a cause down if you give it enough thought. It isn't a pleasant process, but a good psychologist or therapist can help with figuring out the root cause as well as helpful coping mechanisms that will make it easier to handle.

[Vallium]

On 3/12/2017 at 4:51 PM, Nova said:

Actually i was at the psychologist only because they tested me  because of my insecurity.

But well

I told my parents about social aniexty bit apparently they dont understand what it is.

I had as little child never that problem.

I drove with the subway always into the inner city to my primary school and also never had aniexty but now.

May i had somekind of trauma.

Well you did hear a few racist assholes talk about you on the subway awhile back, I'd say that's a cause, and hearing people talk negatively about you affects you over time.

You may just have to consciously remember not everyone is going to be like that. 

[Nova]

1 hour ago, WolfNightV4X1 said:

Well you did hear a few racist assholes talk about you on the subway awhile back, I'd say that's a cause, and hearing people talk negatively about you affects you over time.

You may just have to consciously remember not everyone is going to be like that. 

Maybe because of that.

I mean i was bullied in primary school and some of the kids talked behind my back and i heard that.

Maybe that feeling of negativity kinda broke out now in my puberty.