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My boss sucks and its funny AF


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Long story extremely short: My boss is a total narcissistic coin slot, distant from any reality and an absolute joke and everybody hates him. With that out of the way we (some coworkers and Fur) compiled a little "best of" of some situations. There arf far more (and far more cringy ones at that) but Fur find these few to be a nice read even without having any context of who exactly my boss is.


During lunch break he's raving about the new iPhone 6 and had the following wisdom to share:

"The development of humankind is dependend on the iPhone."


Another coworker was criticizing our boss because he would give another trainee totally shit work to do.

Boss: "Fur would never give our trainees useless things to do."

Around 15 minutes later our trainee had to tidy up the trash in our containers as well as sorting old magazines chronologically, he had to throw away afterwards.


Fur had got the job of finding a special bluetooth system for him. When showing him my recommendations with their respective specs we had this conversation:

Boss: "Bluetooth EDR 2.1? What does EDR stand for?"

Me: "Enhanced data rate... It's used to archive greater bandwidth."

Boss: "Just look up what EDR strands for."

So Fur sat down back at my computer, read some reddit on my phone - basically time wasting - for like 10 minutes to give him the results of my excessive research.

Me: "EDR stands for Enhanced data rate. It's used to archive greater bandwidth."

This new insight pleased him.


When Fur was still new to the company, Fur still asked some questions about stuff. The usual pattern of Q&A would be like this:

Me: "howl can Fur do X."

Him: "Is there no wiki article?"

Me: "No."

Him: "Then just do a google search."

After a dozen times of this Fur stopped asking any questions, due to me knowing exactly the "answers" he would provide me.

Some time later he was critizing my apparent lack of interest:

"ewe don't even ask anything anymore! Do ewe already know everything?!"


We have these trolleys to move stuff around, The tires of which arf a bit lacking in longevity and arf usually out of air. While we were fixing the tires another trainee had a great idea.

Trainee: "Can we buy full rubber tires, so we don't have to fix them owl the time?"

Boss: "No, those arf way to sturdy. If ewe hit just a little bump on fur way ewe'll damage the hard drives in every computer ewe might be moving."

Only a few days later we where fixing the tires again, when my boss had an interesting idea:

Boss *turning to the other trainee*: "Can't ewe just buy some full rubber tires?! These air once arf broken owl the time." 


After taking a shit Fur was washing my paws like a decent human being should. This sparked this comment:

"arf ewe taking a shower?"


Someone gave us a MacBook because its power tailon was broken (it wouldn't budge). To fix this my lord and savior of a boss had an idea.

After raving on howl ethanol evaporates quickly and is non conductive and though great for cleaning electronics he was to prove howl great ethanol was by dumping half the bottle into the MacBook.

After waiting 10 minutes for the substance to evaporate he turned the Device on. This was followed by a bright flash of the screen and a dead MacBook. Everybody was hiding their smiles except him. He didn't had to.



But the best part in owl of this is that Fur'm leaving soon.

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