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The Saga of North


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That was quite the story, it's amazing how there are people with so little self-awareness. I've actually encountered some people very similar to this when running RPGs, and now I am very careful when recruiting for my RPG groups...

In Sophomore year of college I started a group meant to introduce D&D to those who had never played tabletop RPGs before, which I was luckily only running for two sessions. Two of the guys playing turned out to be huge weeaboos, making really poorly stated female characters (one of which was specified to be the guy's waifu) and things quickly went downhill, with them becoming the worst players I have ever had in their own special ways:

Weeabo #1, after making it clear his character was also his waifu, proceeded to only use the character to make childish sex jokes (as well as point out the fact his character had boobs...) and references to his favorite animu. Weeabo #2 was much worse, indulging in similar behavior to #1 but additionally trying to dominate and lead the party while also always trying to be the center of attention. He also had serious anger issues, and would throw childish tantrums at times as well as hold grudges against other players. they were friends, so together, #1 and #2 would often insist their characters were having lesbian sex, or just discuss anime and ignore the game...

Some highlights of #2 (#1's antics pale in comparison, his worst was egging #2 on and the constant references to his character having boobs [I'm serious, he would simply say this with no other content or context]):

-Constantly saying he is "rolling to rape" another character, and getting annoyed when I would simply say no to this (which became my usual response to many of his antics)

-Party is entering a ruined castle, he is bringing up the rear. Everyone cautiously enters the ruin though the front entrance, but he decides he wants to punch through the wall next to the door. I tell him that this is a bad idea, and very unlikely to succeed, but he insists, so i let him do it. He is shocked when I give him a -15 modifier, as he was punching a foot thick stone wall, and angry when he failed and I told him his character had broken their hand.

-As the party prepared to go down to the next level of the castle, #2 decided that he would surf a table down the stairs. This I let him do, as it could only have hilarious results, and as would be expected he ended up in a heap at the bottom of the stairs, with a broken leg and many splinters, surrounded by bandits. the rest of the party barely managed to save him, and he was quite mad that I didn't simply let him succeed "because it would have been cool".

-Another member of the party accidentally hit him on a critical fail of a ranged attack, only doing slight damage and #2's rage was stoked. For the rest of that session, he continually tried to attack that character, even though I simply said no every time...

-Constantly second guessing the plans of the player who had become the party leader, even when he had no plan himself. Complained when the party at one point experienced a setback, which was largely his fault for running off to do his own thing (he was a tank and left the more squishy characters open to attack by charging ahead)

-When I moved the location across campus to a place more convenient to most of the other players, he threw a tantrum, when it only meant a few minute walk for him.

If the campaign was going to be longer, I probably would have ejected them, but as it was only two sessions, i simply blocked actions of his that directly targeted other characters or would seriously hinder the party, but let him do anything else stupid that he wanted as the end result was usually hilarious (by the end of the second session his character was pretty much a cripple from all the stupid things he did...). So, now I am very careful that news of openings in my groups don't reach possible trouble players, and if it does I will usually tell then the party is already full...

(guess I'm still pretty salty about this, that turned into quite a rant...)

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