Vallium Posted June 17, 2016 Share Posted June 17, 2016 Personal life threads, unless theyre lighthearted or not too deep are something I tend to avoid and/or use sparingly. I like using these forums for general discussion but heck if I ever draw too much attention to myself like a whore over personal drama, and dont particpate otherwise (Hell if I become the next Crystal or Eversleep) But I feel bad, kinda bad actually. Same things as usual but things are heading back to somewhere where I have another potentially stressful situation to look forward to and hope for the best. I kind of want to keep it vague to protect the identities of numerous individuals, friends and people that I know on and off this site. Its kinda cringey that they may be guessable but I guess thats only if you look too deeply into it and I need to speak about it someway, somehow, even just to throw things out there I do have a schedule to keep amongst personal concerns so I have to get this out of the way so I can move on with life's important chores and focuses So alas, here's to a vent on numerous introspective concerns Im worried that Im going to be hated or despised or hurt certain people because they lost favor with me over time based on events, and in a way I opened up to new people where things work better, more cooperative, and less one-sided. But I still feel in the wrong, a terrible person even, because I feel like I betrayed or hurt those in my past with these new ones in my life, or that they would think so at least. I also hate that its always hard to share aspects of myself regardless, things I like that others never will. It feels like if I did I always would get shot down, or meh, or looked down on. So I close off and tend to be passive, and I let others open up and show me things and do what they want with them instead. One of the things I guess I should work on is being assertive...but Im just not. I also can only focus on one or a few people at a time...that leaves everyone else to fall away into the background. And its frustrating because I never stopped disliking them, its just so hard to keep up. I also have another friend who Ive let down...awkwardly so. Its always under the guise that Im busy but in the end its because I dont know how to tell them Im tired of our normal, jaded routine. Something we started as simply a silly pastime or bonding activity turned into something too serious and demanding of intention, and its exhausting. Now everytime we speak its always to bring up the one or the other, and for me to casually avoid it somehow. I should do other things with them too like watch movies and such but it always comes back to that I dont know why...maybe its because Im too changeable, it must be me. I hate that. I hate that things change too quickly. I wish they could stay static, be as it were as long as forever could possibly feel in a strict timeline. But every time, it always happen. Something or someone I once enjoyed in my life always falls through and all Im left with is vague, hazy memories of what I liked about it, but trying to reclaim it never works. I hate dissappointing people that have cared about me...its not like I had many to begin with, so why have I failed the few that did? I often regret opening up to people only to inevitably lose them to my own folly, wouldnt it have been better to be alone, stick to myself and only myself? As long as I have myself, I cant dissapoint me as much as I can others. If only social norms didnt dictate I shouldnt be so self-centric ...also my addictive tendencies such as sex and mass amounts of sugar are getting to me and I feel guilty and sick about it but the cause of that may just be a mix of puberty and freedom and hopefully that might come to pass soon 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ricky Posted June 17, 2016 Share Posted June 17, 2016 A friend to all is a friend to none. 10 minutes ago, WolfNightV4X1 said: ...also my addictive tendencies such as sex and mass amounts of sugar are getting to me and I feel guilty and sick about it but the cause of that may just be a mix of puberty and freedom and hopefully that might come to pass soon Sex isn't a problem unless you end up catching STD's. Sugar isn't a problem unless you are diabetic, or fat. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
root Posted June 17, 2016 Share Posted June 17, 2016 7 minutes ago, Ricky said: Sugar isn't a problem unless you are diabetic, or fat. Yep. I think people blow sugar's negativeness out of proportion. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ricky Posted June 17, 2016 Share Posted June 17, 2016 1 minute ago, root said: Yep. I think people blow sugar's image out of proportion. Calories are calories, that's all it really comes down to. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vallium Posted June 17, 2016 Author Share Posted June 17, 2016 2 hours ago, Ricky said: A friend to all is a friend to none. Sex isn't a problem unless you end up catching STD's. Sugar isn't a problem unless you are diabetic, or fat. I dont quite attempt to be friends with everyone, but Id at least like to be friendlier and less socially retarded. As for 'all' I dont even have many friends to begin with and the ones I did have are just out there living their lives, probably vaguely dissapointed I havent spoken to them, oftentimes their the ones that prod me first and I try to make an effort to prod back. But eventually my involvement wears thin.... Eh...also that last thing is a bit different of a personal issue, I hate sex in the sense of being sex-centric because there is a lot of other cool stuff to fixate on but my libido wont let me >:T...and Ive been taught since I was younger that its inherently bad so I feel a sense of shame sometimes harking back to older days 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ricky Posted June 17, 2016 Share Posted June 17, 2016 17 minutes ago, WolfNightV4X1 said: Eh...also that last thing is a bit different of a personal issue, I hate sex in the sense of being sex-centric because there is a lot of other cool stuff to fixate on but my libido wont let me >:T...and Ive been taught since I was younger that its inherently bad so I feel a sense of shame sometimes harking back to older days Lol, you sound like me. "Mr. Hyperactive sex drive" x3 Maybe I'll find a way to shame and humiliate you if we ever meetup one day >:3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Feelwell Posted June 17, 2016 Share Posted June 17, 2016 26 minutes ago, WolfNightV4X1 said: Eh...also that last thing is a bit different of a personal issue, I hate sex in the sense of being sex-centric because there is a lot of other cool stuff to fixate on but my libido wont let me >:T...and Ive been taught since I was younger that its inherently bad so I feel a sense of shame sometimes harking back to older days Well what's the point in worrying over it if you can't do anything about it? Either it'll pass or you'll find a way to deal with it. It's not a big thing Wolfnight. It's not going to rule you, it's just a small part of you or it's a side effect. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vallium Posted June 17, 2016 Author Share Posted June 17, 2016 1 hour ago, Ricky said: Lol, you sound like me. "Mr. Hyperactive sex drive" x3 Maybe I'll find a way to shame and humiliate you if we ever meetup one day >:3 Das not muh kink bruh 1 hour ago, Feelwell the Rabbit said: Well what's the point in worrying over it if you can't do anything about it? Either it'll pass or you'll find a way to deal with it. It's not a big thing Wolfnight. It's not going to rule you, it's just a small part of you or it's a side effect. It doesnt feel like a small part at times, but I shall trust the expertise of a rabbit regarding hyperactive sex drives 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ricky Posted June 17, 2016 Share Posted June 17, 2016 1 minute ago, WolfNightV4X1 said: Das not muh kink bruh You're the one who said sex brings you shame. It might not be *your* kink, but it sure is mine Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
#00Buck Posted June 17, 2016 Share Posted June 17, 2016 6 hours ago, WolfNightV4X1 said: Lots of words. Thanks for sharing. Awareness is the key. Awareness of your self, others, situations, circumstances, wants, and needs. If you can be aware of all of those things at the same time and try to match most of them up you should have a decent social life. Life is making decisions based on less than perfect information. So as a result sometimes life is far less than perfect. But with a little luck and powers of observation you can match enough things to make your life bearable and sometimes even fun. Good luck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
root Posted June 17, 2016 Share Posted June 17, 2016 4 hours ago, WolfNightV4X1 said: Eh...also that last thing is a bit different of a personal issue, I hate sex in the sense of being sex-centric because there is a lot of other cool stuff to fixate on but my libido wont let me >:T...and Ive been taught since I was younger that its inherently bad so I feel a sense of shame sometimes harking back to older days Sounds like it's... 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ricky Posted June 17, 2016 Share Posted June 17, 2016 Eh, scientifically, aside from lowering testosterone (or catecholamine) levels either chemically or mechanically, the next best thing would be to have sexual activity with multiple partners. And yes, there are sources to back this up, too :3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Endless/Nameless Posted June 17, 2016 Share Posted June 17, 2016 Forgive me; I'm undergoing a long workweek and my reading comp is fucking shit at the moment so I dunno that I have a full grasp of the matter. But yeah, I think I understand/have experienced most of the things described here. At least you care, that's something to feel good about being. Also, you have to remember you only have so much of yourself to give. Yeah, you should try to make time for others, but you need to look out for your needs too. If that ends up disturbing a relationship, it's not really anyone's fault. It happens. Plenty of relationships have a way of going that way as time goes on anyway, whether we like it or not. So just do your best with what you've got, and hang on to it while it lasts. And yes, fixations are just dandy 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hewge Posted June 17, 2016 Share Posted June 17, 2016 WTB extra libido. Please send a PM! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ricky Posted June 18, 2016 Share Posted June 18, 2016 22 minutes ago, Hewge said: WTB extra libido. Please send a PM! Just take dopamine and norepinephrine agonists, especially D3 dopamine agonists. This has been shown to cause hypersexuality, for example in cases of amphetamine abuse and side effects of many drugs used to treat Parkinson's Disease. It is also associated with lesions on the temporal lobe but I'm not quite sure how you'd do that without surgery. Also, steroids like IV testosterone work with the side effect of making you go through puberty again :V Things that help boost testosterone include exercising (especially anaerobic exercise like lifting heavy weights), red meat, fapping and having sex with a single partner. Avoiding things like tofu that seem to shift the types of androgen produced should probably be avoided, along with vegans and bicyclists. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fantasma Posted June 18, 2016 Share Posted June 18, 2016 @WolfNightV4X1 Val, let's say if I were to stop coming to a friends house because they always tried to push me into what they see as right. They do it because that is their form of love, but it hurts and holds me back. You can't please everyone, you just got to please yourself. Also we do a shitton every week between the outdoors, tv, silat, and just general hijinks don't feel bad. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.