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Having nothing on your mind


DevilishlyHandsome49
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I feel kinda lame making this thread, but I have to vent somehow

I'm starting to realize that lately, I have nothing interesting to talk about...or at least I don't think so. I'm only good with conversation when a topic is given to me or if I'm given something to bounce off of. When it comes to coming up with topics of my own and starting a convo, it will end up being one of these 2 outcomes:

"Nah, topic isn't long enough tor a good convo. Too 'small talky' "

"Nah, this topic is stupid and no one will have interest in it"

So I stay quiet but that doesn't really make for building relationships. My self-esteem is pathetically low. I get worried over everything I say. Worried that because I can't see someone's face when I chat with them online, I won't know their true feelings on something I decide to talk about. Whether they're interested or not. Whether I'll seem lame to them. 

Its frustrating. I've always been nervous about this sort of thing, but never to this extreme.I feel if I don't find a way to build up my confidence and fast, its going to bite me in the ass

 

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23 minutes ago, Chrysocyon said:

I can relate to a lot of this. :C

But I think you're one of the more interesting people on this board, Dev. I mean, you lead us in terrible movies every week.  That's gotta count for something.

You got a point there. During those nights, I'm the most outgoing in a sense. I just wish that same enthusiasm would last outside that night. I mean you've seen some pretty stupid but funny shit I say in the chat and I don't care :P but once the night is over, its like I'm suddenly conscious about it

23 minutes ago, PastryOfApathy said:

If you have anything to talk about just post garbage and let it talk for you. That's what I do.

Yeah but knowing me, I'll probably start worrying about if my garbage is garbage enough :V

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21 minutes ago, Clove Darkwave said:

Learn how to carry the conversation along by gracefully bouncing it back up again regardless of the depth of your input, or just learn how to ask questions. It is much more interesting to draw things out of other people.

I think I've done the question thing before. I guess I'm just wondering when questions could turn into prodding by accident or something

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Nothing wrong with being the quiet sort, I tend to only respond about myself or my views on something.  Should that be inappropriate I'll ask questions about them regarding a similar matter to what was brought up to change the topic and fuel the conversation with more stuff.  People who regard the quiet sort as being boring really are quite shallow, it's a good thing in my opinion as it gives the 'What are they like?' mental question an answer immediately.

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I have the same problem and I can tell you this: it doesn't get easier with age.

The trick is to let go.

Stop keeping the bore-score! Everybody is too wrapped up in their own little lives to keep a tally of how many bad conversations you start, so why should you? Just talk. Talk about what interests you, what you fear, what you want. Talk about the cliches: the weather, the sport-ball or video games, the ennui of life. Talk about anything you can hit upon. If they're not showing interest, find a stopping point, start asking them questions, or drag a bystander in if you can. If it goes south, it was just practice and you can try again later.

You have nothing to lose. Life will go on if you bore somebody. Trust me, I know: I'm one of the most boring people on the planet!

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