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Wrench in the Face


Wrecker
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So I did the exact stupid thing that 99% of the time I make sure I never do: put my face in front of a wrench... Especially a fucking crescent wrench.

But, it was Friday, fuck it day I guess, and blamo 18" crescent wrench right in the mouth.

I was tightening a u-bolt, but it was in a shitty spot, and I had to lean over the edge of a hand rail to see where the nut was, putting my face directly in the line of fire. Like a typical crescent wrench, the worm gear was fucked and it was a pain in the ass to adjust it to the size of the nut, so I figured fuck it and let it progressively round the edges off. Right when I was about to give er shit and tighten the living fuck out of said nut, the wrench slipped and clocked me right in the mouth. Insta blood.

Shit like that is usually a recordable incident where I work, it's a piss test, a bunch of paperwork and a hit to the safety record which isn't good for getting awarded contracts in the future, and I was right out in the open for the world to see me eat a wrench... Thank fuck nobody saw it, and the guy I was supposed to be working with did his usual disappear for a few hours thing. First reaction was to make sure I still had my front teeth... Second was calling myself an idiot.

I was praying to not get a fat lip to explain over it, which I didn't thankfully. I'm thinking it's because it got me right below the nose.

Still hurts like a son of a bitch though.

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48 minutes ago, Socketosis said:

If you told them you ran into a wall while on break would they still count it as a workplace incident?

I don't think so, it was right after lunch, and I was racking my brain to think of something that I could say I did on that time to smoke myself like that, but I couldn't think of anything. I can actually leave site on lunch on this job considering it's in town and not in the middle of nowhere, and it's not a paid lunch either, so I would bet that they couldn't count something happening on that time toward anything.

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I hope you feel better soon. That's odd, I never pictured you with a wrench and tools. I always imagined you as a college professor, or part of some kinda international think tank, or perhaps working on K street, in DC! Though even in Watergate, they did have leaks to fix :V

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  • 2 weeks later...
6 hours ago, Azure said:

Easy on the.money maker friend. Also a nice.tip, if you are gonna be any kind.of fucked up a work buy those fake dicks so.you'll always piss clean.

Not a chance, I'm way too nervous to try that kind of stuff, plus they usually lab it and like fuck if I'm goona strap a sack of somebody else's piss on myself. Nope nope nope nope nope.

Of course, there's always a pile of junk that doesn't take a month to clear, so yeehaw or something. Days off are usually a good time.

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Lol, believe me bud, I am well aware of the dangers of putting your face near tools. (hue hue)

My co-worker antoine once broke his nose with a roto hammer because the bit ran into a piece of rebar. Just about a month or two ago I was operating a metal grinder at face level when the blade shattered and the whole tool flew out of my hands and smacked me in the face. Here's a picture of the aftermath: NSFW big nasty flesh wound

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11 minutes ago, MuttButt said:

Lol, believe me bud, I am well aware of the dangers of putting your face near tools. (hue hue)

My co-worker antoine once broke his nose with a roto hammer because the bit ran into a piece of rebar. Just about a month or two ago I was operating a metal grinder at face level when the blade shattered and the whole tool flew out of my hands and smacked me in the face. Here's a picture of the aftermath: NSFW big nasty flesh wound

Holy shit that looks incredibly painful. At least it didn't hit you in the eye.

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1 hour ago, Feelwell the Rabbit said:

Holy shit that looks incredibly painful. At least it didn't hit you in the eye.

Or my neck. Or my mouth. I'm also lucky it didn't sever a nerve or an important blood vessel in my face. It coulda gone a whole lot worse in a lot of ways really x3

Amazingly the most painful part of the ordeal was getting the numbing shot. Shit felt like a 30 second bee sting.

On the bright side, my boss paid the insurance deductible and I got a sweet scar and some pain meds out of the deal. Shame they didn't give me anything stronger than what they did though, I killed the whole bottle in like a day T.T

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