i cried at work today

[Gator]

only a little... but i was doing OK on my time for once (always run into little dumb problems that put me off schedule; i can count on one hand the number of times i've clocked out close to the scheduled end of my shift, and i've been here for a few months now).  then the manager tells me to get everybody's cardboard off the floor and bale it.  like.  that's THEIR job, which they are supposed to do so that i am able to do MY job.  but i understand, perhaps better than i would like, that shit happens and you run out of time for certain things.  so i did it, and what do you know, it took about an hour out of my time and put me way behind schedule.  it was ten minutes til the end of my shift when i was able to finish sweeping the floor, which is only the second-to-last thing i'm supposed to do: the last thing, running the scrubber, takes close to an hour altogether. 

so between being stressed that it was so late and that i really can't afford to stay an hour late 'cause i have other shit going on at home that i need to do and a schedule to keep outside of work, and being scared that i was gonna get in trouble for not having time to finish everything properly (either do "bare minimum" scrubbing or none, neither of which looks good on me regardless of it not being my fault)... i started getting kinda upset.  adding in other stresses and personal issues that i won't air out here, by the time i went to the manager to ask her what i should do, i was sniffling like a little girl.  this, of course, prompted the manager and two others to start asking me what was wrong and telling me not to be so upset, etc etc... which only embarrassed me further and thus made it even worse.  but i did get permission to do bare minimum scrub. 

i did manage to reign in my emotional attack before going out to finish my work, and i felt terrible about not doing every single tiny little aisle like i normally do, and i am ashamed of myself and i think i need to go sit in the corner tbh. 

at least i have a day off, even if only one.  i hope everyone forgets about this shit during that time, because i sure as hell don't ever want it being brought up again. 

plz halp

my dignity has been compromised.

[root]

Aw you sound like a sweetheart.

[Wax]

7 minutes ago, root said:

Aw you sound like a sweetheart.

Seconded.

[Gator]

57 minutes ago, root said:

Aw you sound like a sweetheart.

 

49 minutes ago, Wax said:

Seconded.

wat

 

[Kinare]

Sounds like you're the floors guy for a store or something? Yeh... the retail environment isn't good no matter what job you have. If it isn't customers being assholes, it's managers or co-workers fucking shit up for you/yelling at you just for existing.

I do find it odd that you would be asked to do a job that isn't yours and is someone else's. You'd think at the very least the people responsible for the mess of boxes would be scolded for leaving the mess, but meh. So glad I'm not in retail anymore. .-. I feel for you.

[Gator]

3 minutes ago, Kinare said:

Sounds like you're the floors guy for a store or something? Yeh... the retail environment isn't good no matter what job you have. If it isn't customers being assholes, it's managers or co-workers fucking shit up for you/yelling at you just for existing.

I do find it odd that you would be asked to do a job that isn't yours and is someone else's. You'd think at the very least the people responsible for the mess of boxes would be scolded for leaving the mess, but meh. So glad I'm not in retail anymore. .-. I feel for you.

yeah, retail is pretty garbagey.  especially now that i'm the maintenance guy :U

i kinda miss being on the sales floor and dealing with customers.  i rather them gripe at me than managers and coworkers...

but the thing that really burns me about this particular job is the lack of structure.  the stock people don't pick up after themselves half the time (some do, but a lot of them leave shit for me to find hours later or dirty the floor after i've already swept it), or they don't finish their work until the very end of the shift or later (not necessarily blaming them for that, but certain individuals may or may not take some pretty long fifteen minute breaks), and everything i do depends on either them getting their stuff picked up or a manager giving me the keys to something/having the time to stand around and watch me do it because "safety".  the only things that seem to be done on any kind of schedule are breaks; the rest is just me running around praying i'll be able to do the stuff i need to do when i'm ready to do it.  i never stop looking at the clock, keeping track of how long certain things take, and readjusting my plans to maximize time left and make up for time lost. 

but the only one who cares about my schedule is me, and i admittedly got pretty butthurt today when i told one of the managers i was running behind and she said "well, you need to start timing yourself when you do things".  8I  outwardly, i politely told her that i did do that, but there were things i couldn't always account for that were beyond my control, like being asked to pick up all the boxes today.  inwardly, i was about to bust a goddamn gasket.

was actually told 2 days ago that one of the managers would talk to me about working out a schedule.  no one has done so yet, and the manager who told me that hasn't been there since she said it.  so i guess i'll have to wait until she gets back or ask somebody else, idfk.  on the one hand, i feel like the schedule talk was supposed to be some form of admonishment "because today we had to do 2 things for you" (they didn't have to, as i had fully planned to do them, but apparently they wanted them done at a certain time and i was unable to do them at that time because i had already been told to do something else--go figure).  on the other hand, forget being salty about people griping at me over stuff that's their own damn fault, i would really welcome finally having a schedule that i can stick to and reference whenever someone tries to tell me to do things differently. 

i had a schedule lined up when i first started, based on what my trainer told me (he made me a pretty detailed list with time blocks and everything), and it worked pretty well for a few weeks, but then people started coming up and telling me to do this and that at certain times, making me move things around, telling me they weren't available whenever i turned to ask for something, and my schedule pretty much went out the window.  SO AN OFFICIAL MANAGER-APPROVED SCHEDULE SURE WOULD BE GREAT, IF THE 3 OF THEM COULD ACTUALLY AGREE ON SOMETHING AND THEN FIND THE TIME TO TELL ME ABOUT IT.

 

welp that turned out to be a much longer response than intended, i am sorry. 

[Kinare]

2 hours ago, Gator said:

welp that turned out to be a much longer response than intended, i am sorry. 

Lolz, don't worry about it yo. This forum is intended for rants, no matter how big or small. Not gonna lie, I did only read like 75% of it, but I think I got the important bits.

But yeah, I'd be just as furious as you (especially in regards to the schedule fiasco), guaranteed. And because I'm a bottler, I'd probably be reacting the same way, too. There were a couple times I shed some tears over work while in retail, once while in the break room. Can't remember what happened to cause it, probably for the best I guess.

[Butters]

5 hours ago, Gator said:

and i felt terrible about not doing every single tiny little aisle like i normally do, and i am ashamed of myself and i think i need to go sit in the corner tbh. 

 

I used to be kinda like this before I ran outta fucks. 

[Vallium]

TLdr but the title made me sad.

Many hugs will read later

[Gator]

8 hours ago, Kinare said:

Lolz, don't worry about it yo. This forum is intended for rants, no matter how big or small. Not gonna lie, I did only read like 75% of it, but I think I got the important bits.

But yeah, I'd be just as furious as you (especially in regards to the schedule fiasco), guaranteed. And because I'm a bottler, I'd probably be reacting the same way, too. There were a couple times I shed some tears over work while in retail, once while in the break room. Can't remember what happened to cause it, probably for the best I guess.

i think that's the problem, right there: bottling everything makes it all boil over eventually.  but i can't exactly go around whining about being stressed or angry or tired, either, so whaddayagonnado~

6 hours ago, Butters said:

I used to be kinda like this before I ran outta fucks. 

you should come take a few of my fucks

...wait a minute

5 hours ago, WolfNightV4X1 said:

TLdr but the title made me sad.

Many hugs will read later

i hold you to this but accept hugs in the meantime anyway

[PastryOfApathy]

40 minutes ago, Gator said:

i think that's the problem, right there: bottling everything makes it all boil over eventually.  but i can't exactly go around whining about being stressed or angry or tired, either, so whaddayagonnado~

Just be careful about bottling things up, since it can fuck you up something fierce.

I refuse to go into specifics (and this isn't my thread to derail anyways), but I know this all too well and believe me when I say that.

[Gator]

1 minute ago, PastryOfApathy said:

Just be careful about bottling things up, since it can fuck you up something fierce.

I refuse to go into specifics (and this isn't my thread to derail anyways), but I know this all too well and believe me when I say that.

aye, i know how it goes... at least i have forums and a couple of friends to dump on from time to time ;v;

[Endless/Nameless]

:c

Hang in there. 

Whats that thing furries do? Ah yes–

*hugz*

[#00Buck]

Tell people to pick up their cardboard. 

Tell the boss to tell their employees to pick up their cardboard. 

 

[Gator]

2 hours ago, Endless/Nameless said:

:c

Hang in there. 

Whats that thing furries do? Ah yes–

*hugz*

at least y'all are warm and cuddly

45 minutes ago, #00Buck said:

Tell people to pick up their cardboard. 

Tell the boss to tell their employees to pick up their cardboard. 

 

i doubt it would go anywhere, and i definitely don't want to start any shit at work. 

[FlynnCoyote]

It's perfectly okay to lose control once in a while. Nobody's made of stone. 

[Kinare]

11 hours ago, Gator said:

i think that's the problem, right there: bottling everything makes it all boil over eventually.  but i can't exactly go around whining about being stressed or angry or tired, either, so whaddayagonnado~

Yup. It's a tough situation to be in. Good friends though, if you have them, can be a good source of stress relief. I struggle with allowing myself to rant at people because I don't want to upset or hurt them, would rather let myself stay miserable than risk it, and my venting has made friends give up on me before. Some people have told me that means they weren't really friends to begin with, but I dunno what a real friend is then I guess.

Point is, maybe you can try to find someone that will let you talk or discuss this stuff with you that understands - like these forums! Some of us peeps on here that have been through similar might not mind if you bug 'em sometimes. Helping people makes me feel useful, so I'm here if I can be of service.

[Vallium]

11 hours ago, Gator said:

i hold you to this but accept hugs in the meantime anyway

I hold true to this cause and am sympathetic to your plight, my apologies for the previous flippant response as I was short on time previously

Breaking down emotionally at work sounds terrible, at the very least Im sure they know youre a diligent worker, from what I read you sound like you always do an ace job

In any case, I also wish you well on the personal issues that led up to that event. Shiz is rough, yo

[#00Buck]

10 hours ago, Gator said:

i doubt it would go anywhere, and i definitely don't want to start any shit at work. 

That isn't starting shit. That is standing up for yourself and telling people to do the job they are paid to do. 

It could go somewhere if you told the right person. 

Why should you cry while others take advantage of you?

[Wax]

1 hour ago, #00Buck said:

That isn't starting shit. That is standing up for yourself and telling people to do the job they are paid to do. 

It could go somewhere if you told the right person. 

Why should you cry while others take advantage of you?

Unless your managers are total dickbags who don't give a single shit about their employees and are just generally assholes, I have to agree. ^

If something really pisses me off at my work, I bring it up with my supervisor. If it doesn't get sorted, I go to the manager. It's the only way, especially if people are treating you like that, like Buck said, you shouldn't be taken advantage of like that.

[Gator]

17 hours ago, FlynnCoyote said:

It's perfectly okay to lose control once in a while. Nobody's made of stone. 

I TRY THOUGH

literally me irl

11 hours ago, Kinare said:

Yup. It's a tough situation to be in. Good friends though, if you have them, can be a good source of stress relief. I struggle with allowing myself to rant at people because I don't want to upset or hurt them, would rather let myself stay miserable than risk it, and my venting has made friends give up on me before. Some people have told me that means they weren't really friends to begin with, but I dunno what a real friend is then I guess.

Point is, maybe you can try to find someone that will let you talk or discuss this stuff with you that understands - like these forums! Some of us peeps on here that have been through similar might not mind if you bug 'em sometimes. Helping people makes me feel useful, so I'm here if I can be of service.

i have at least one person i talk to about everything on a regular basis.  it helps, but even the best of friends can only hear the same complaints so many times before they get frustrated or go numb to it.  so there are a lot of things i keep more or less to myself, or tone down significantly if/when i do talk about them.  doesn't do me a lot of good, but there's nothing anyone else can do about it anyway except listen and nod.

i appreciate it, though.  i've just kinda resigned myself to whatever my current situation is, writing any emotional outbursts off as "one of those days", and continuing my struggle to reach whatever far-off goal it is that i think will make things better.  ...not that i won't still pop in with a dumb rant from time to time because venting is important.  but i don't wanna bother anybody more than i "have" to.

7 hours ago, #00Buck said:

That isn't starting shit. That is standing up for yourself and telling people to do the job they are paid to do. 

It could go somewhere if you told the right person. 

Why should you cry while others take advantage of you?

well, it was the manager telling me to do this while knowing what all i had left to do, so i assume there was a valid enough reason behind it, like there being a heavy workload.  i notice the stockers often go home even later than i do; it's just kinda how things are, so i figured it was best not to bother.  the last thing i need is to come across as argumentative or whatever, which i likely would whether i was trying to or not.  i'm not exactly well-liked at work, but as long as nobody is actively singling me out, i'd rather just do my job and get out than risk ruffling any feathers.

5 hours ago, Wax said:

Unless your managers are total dickbags who don't give a single shit about their employees and are just generally assholes, I have to agree. ^

If something really pisses me off at my work, I bring it up with my supervisor. If it doesn't get sorted, I go to the manager. It's the only way, especially if people are treating you like that, like Buck said, you shouldn't be taken advantage of like that.

eh, it's the nature of retail.  if i really think something is unreasonable, i might try to talk to someone about it, but so far i haven't gotten it any worse than anyone else. 

[Kinare]

39 minutes ago, Gator said:

i've just kinda resigned myself to whatever my current situation is, writing any emotional outbursts off as "one of those days", and continuing my struggle to reach whatever far-off goal it is that i think will make things better.

Pretty much the same deal here. Not much else we can do but try our best to press on though, eh?

[Frozen Glacier]

I think at one time I cried at my job, I was terrified of heights, and the manager was pretty much yelling at me to go up a 30 foot ladder and retrieve shit from the top of the aisle. I remember being so scared, I was crying on the way up and all the way down. And it took only five minutes, but the way the manager treated me was shitty.

[Gator]

2 hours ago, Frozen Glacier said:

I think at one time I cried at my job, I was terrified of heights, and the manager was pretty much yelling at me to go up a 30 foot ladder and retrieve shit from the top of the aisle. I remember being so scared, I was crying on the way up and all the way down. And it took only five minutes, but the way the manager treated me was shitty.

D: i feel for you so hard

i am also afraid of ladders tbh.  though for me it's more the ladder itself than the height.  even short ones scare me lol

but managers shouldn't be dicks about stuff like that. 

[Wax]

2 hours ago, Frozen Glacier said:

I think at one time I cried at my job, I was terrified of heights, and the manager was pretty much yelling at me to go up a 30 foot ladder and retrieve shit from the top of the aisle. I remember being so scared, I was crying on the way up and all the way down. And it took only five minutes, but the way the manager treated me was shitty.

30 foot ladder???

Um... I don't know specifically where you live but I'm certain that there are safety regulations regarding use of ladders at a height like that. Due to the nature of the shelving at my work, we use 'aircraft steps' for getting up to correct heights, and use ride-along 'caddies' that extend (kind of like a scissor-lift) to get to really high places.