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I LOVE The Fair!

Toshabi

By Toshabi,
in Rants & Raves

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Toshabi Newbie

Toshabi

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Things that come to mind when I think 'The Fair':

• Unhealthy Food

• Unsafe Rides

• Unhealthy Food

• Borderline scammy Carnival Games

• Unhealthy Food

• Living ads of people selling products you don't need but might impulse buy anyways

• Unhealthy Food.

 

And I love all those things about it. The fair comes and goes but once a year and boy, its the best thing about San Diego come this time of year. It lasts for the whole month of June and by golly, that barely gives you enough time to enjoy every bit of it. And just.... jesus the food. THE FOOD!!!

20160611_193854.jpg

 

 

And that's barely scratching the tip of this monstrosity. They had deep fried ice cream, lemonade, frog legs and UUUUGH. I helped myself to so much unhealthy food today. I'm going to be trying to detox for the next few months. 

 

As far as spending money on the crazy shpeel of things I don't need, I dropped some cash on some new spices and a tea thermos that legit lets you brew loose leaf on the go. But the highlight for me was watching my fiance ruin the lives of children at competitive carnival games. Any time a line of 6 kids would drop five dollars down to play that gimmicy horse raise/water gun competitive fair game for a pokemon plush, my husbando would slam 5 big ones on the table and fuck some lives. NO KID WILL EVER HAVE A CHARMANDER, BULBASAUR, SQUIRTLE OR PIKACHU PLUSH AS LONG AS MY FIANCE HAS ANYTHING TO SAY ABOUT IT. YEAH >:[

 

Just seeing the raw disappointment in their face as my husband was crowned the winner, that sick, evil grin that grew on his face as he claimed his prize as dozens of children watched in melancholic despair.... it reminds me of why I'm marrying him.

 

Oh we also got to watch a bunch of goats yell at blonde bimbos too, one of which bit and ran off with one of said bimbo's sweatshirts. 

 

It was a fun day. 

 

tl;dr

 

 

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#00Buck Newbie

#00Buck

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21 hours ago, Toshabi said:

Things that come to mind when I think 'The Fair':

• Unhealthy Food

• Unsafe Rides

• Unhealthy Food

• Borderline scammy Carnival Games

• Unhealthy Food

• Living ads of people selling products you don't need but might impulse buy anyways

• Unhealthy Food.

 

Those things sound un-fair to me. 

Glad you had fun. 

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Wrecker Newbie

Wrecker

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Come to think of it, no wonder carnies usually have fucked up teeth and look like they were scraped off the hull of a ship, could you imagine being around bacon wrapped/deep fried everything for a living? No fast food chain has shit on the stuff that pops up at fairs.

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Wrecker Newbie

Wrecker

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16 hours ago, Azure said:

Carnies are that way because half of them or Meth addicts. The other half are alcoholics. Together they probably don't have a full set of teeth between them.

I bet you're right on there, actually. Man, some of them are fucked right into the bushes. There's gotta be a percentage for those selling deep fried ice cream and shit like that.

I read a good article on that though, and it has nothing to do explicitly with the drugs themselves, but the whole spiel that works out between the body not wanting to produce enough saliva to cleanse the palette, and a person not wanting to brush their teeth when they're fucked...

I've spent my fair share of time gagging on a toothbrush trying to keep that in mind.

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GarthTheWereWolf Newbie

GarthTheWereWolf

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California midstate fair comes to my area in late July. Duran Duran is gonna play and its gonna be the shiiiiiit.

Can't wait to get shit-faced drunk, listen to 80s pop, eat some fried cream cheese on a stick with thai chili dipping sauce, then blow a hundred+ bucks on carnival games and useless knickknacks from the vendor area. <;

On 6/11/2016 at 11:07 PM, Toshabi said:

As far as spending money on the crazy shpeel of things I don't need, I dropped some cash on some new spices and a tea thermos that legit lets you brew loose leaf on the go. But the highlight for me was watching my fiance ruin the lives of children at competitive carnival games. Any time a line of 6 kids would drop five dollars down to play that gimmicy horse raise/water gun competitive fair game for a pokemon plush, my husbando would slam 5 big ones on the table and fuck some lives. NO KID WILL EVER HAVE A CHARMANDER, BULBASAUR, SQUIRTLE OR PIKACHU PLUSH AS LONG AS MY FIANCE HAS ANYTHING TO SAY ABOUT IT. YEAH >:[

 

Just seeing the raw disappointment in their face as my husband was crowned the winner, that sick, evil grin that grew on his face as he claimed his prize as dozens of children watched in melancholic despair.... it reminds me of why I'm marrying him.

Toshabi your husbando sounds like a dick. God bless him.

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Catilda Lily Newbie

Catilda Lily

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I worked at a carney booth one year during the local fair. I got paid and at the end of the weekend I got to pick whish ever stuffed animal I wanted. I went with a tiger. I also worked in some food booths other years. It was part of either a church group or swim team. I hated working the milkshake booth. Every year I must, MUST get a bratwurst from this one booth. They have foot long ones, and also prairie fire sausages, so amazing. Also you just have to go visit the critters, and see what people enter in the exhibits. I don't really go on the rides much anymore though.

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Toshabi Newbie

Toshabi

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1 hour ago, GarthTheWereWolf said:

California midstate fair comes to my area in late July. Duran Duran is gonna play and its gonna be the shiiiiiit.

Can't wait to get shit-faced drunk, listen to 80s pop, eat some fried cream cheese on a stick with thai chili dipping sauce, then blow a hundred+ bucks on carnival games and useless knickknacks from the vendor area. <;

Toshabi your husbando sounds like a dick. God bless him.

Would you expect Toshabi's better half to be anything but that? :^)

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Wax Newbie

Wax

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We don't get these in the UK :(

Well, we do but they're a very unofficial thing in my area. Like a once every ten years kind of deal. Even then we don't have quite the extent of unhealthy food available you guys have at these events. Us Brits will stick to our horrendous oral hygiene problems, thank you.

I'd like to visit one one day, just for the experience of having gone to one.

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PastryOfApathy Newbie

PastryOfApathy

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9 minutes ago, Wax said:

We don't get these in the UK :(

Well, we do but they're a very unofficial thing in my area. Like a once every ten years kind of deal. Even then we don't have quite the extent of unhealthy food available you guys have at these events. Us Brits will stick to our horrendous oral hygiene problems, thank you.

I'd like to visit one one day, just for the experience of having gone to one.

Find a gross old stuffed animal at a thrift store, and throw $10 into a toilet.

You have successfully recreated the fair experience.

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Wax Newbie

Wax

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7 minutes ago, PastryOfApathy said:

Find a gross old stuffed animal at a thrift store, and throw $10 into a toilet.

You have successfully recreated the fair experience.

Well last month I drove to my nearest city with my pal for a concert. We were walking to the venue and passed this random beer festival. I was desperate to pee and I spotted they had portable shitters. After sweet talking the security people to let me in (I had no ID) there was a stuffed animal in the toilet and I pissed on it.

Does that count?

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PastryOfApathy Newbie

PastryOfApathy

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6 minutes ago, Wax said:

Well last month I drove to my nearest city with my pal for a concert. We were walking to the venue and passed this random beer festival. I was desperate to pee and I spotted they had portable shitters. After sweet talking the security people to let me in (I had no ID) there was a stuffed animal in the toilet and I pissed on it.

Does that count?

Sure.

Why not?

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Feelwell Newbie

Feelwell

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Honestly not a big fan of Fairs. The food I am terrified to touch as it's the kind of stuff that makes me horrendously ill, like terribly.

Second of all it's hot and I am worried I'll lose it with so many people and the temperature and such.

Third of all, going with family is a pain. I guess I'm probably going with my friends to a annual festival this summer. Hopefully it's good.

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Azure Newbie

Azure

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On 6/14/2016 at 1:53 AM, Wrecker said:

I bet you're right on there, actually. Man, some of them are fucked right into the bushes. There's gotta be a percentage for those selling deep fried ice cream and shit like that.

I read a good article on that though, and it has nothing to do explicitly with the drugs themselves, but the whole spiel that works out between the body not wanting to produce enough saliva to cleanse the palette, and a person not wanting to brush their teeth when they're fucked...

I've spent my fair share of time gagging on a toothbrush trying to keep that in mind.

The body won't produce saliva because people are so high they disregard hydration and nutrition over extended periods time. That and the chemical reaction that occurs when the product is heated and then cooled into a vapor basically bathes the enamel in the least beneficial mix of chemicals. Plus sometimes I crack tweakers in the face with bike locks and riding gloves, so I am responsible for some of those teeth. Gotta be careful around infected populations, one cut on any point of contact can lead to deadly blooborne pathogens and virii. Remember kids, always fight junkies with gloves or weapons cuz you could get AIDS.

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Wrecker Newbie

Wrecker

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2 hours ago, Azure said:

The body won't produce saliva because people are so high they disregard hydration and nutrition over extended periods time. That and the chemical reaction that occurs when the product is heated and then cooled into a vapor basically bathes the enamel in the least beneficial mix of chemicals. Plus sometimes I crack tweakers in the face with bike locks and riding gloves, so I am responsible for some of those teeth. Gotta be careful around infected populations, one cut on any point of contact can lead to deadly blooborne pathogens and virii. Remember kids, always fight junkies with gloves or weapons cuz you could get AIDS.

Hahaha bike lock, fuck that's gotta hurt

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LadyRadarEars Newbie

LadyRadarEars

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1 hour ago, Sarcastic Coffeecup said:

"Bacon Nutella"

I don't even want to try that

I want to slather it in ketchup and six different kinds of cheeses and see how much I can eat before I have to bag it for home because I hate myself and will never eat food ever again.

I get weird cravings sometimes and bacon nutella with cheese would cover most of them all at once, and a nice fruit smoothie would get the rest.

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Fossa Newbie

Fossa

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On 6/14/2016 at 8:02 PM, Catilda Lily said:

Also you just have to go visit the critters, and see what people enter in the exhibits.

Agreed! Having grown up in the boondocks, I always loved going to the county fair, just to see all the animals. The State Fair is OK for this, but doesn't seem to have as many animals. I always liked to see the rabbits, especially---it's amazing how many types there are, and how big they can get. Not to mention the various cattle, goats, pigs, sheep, ducks and what not. Makes me wanna move back outta the city.

The food at them tends to make me toss my cookies, but I generally get a snowball (snow-cone, in most places, but we have snow-balls, here)

 

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