Work Stories

[Clove Darkwave]

We've all got 'em so let's share the best of them. Creepers, Bad boss stories, accidents, funny stories, so on and so forth.

Here's a recent one:

A guy comes in, appears to be in his mid-50s to early 60s. He's got one pierced ear and is wearing a retro comic book t-shirt. This guy just oozes creepy vibes by his body language. Fast forward some initial questions, I'm now showing him one of the cases that might have something kinda like what he wants.

Guy comes uncomfortably, like way too hand close to leg close.

Clove steps away one step and continues talking. Maybe he just stopped a little too close.

Guy steps closer, dialogue continues.

Clove steps away. What the hell.

Steps closer, starts talking about some sci-fi stuff I'm pretending to have no idea of at this point. I can tell where this is going.

Clove steps away, now not even standing at the case, and faces him to get his hand to not be next to my leg.

You guessed it, steps closer.

ohgodswhycan'tsomeoneelsewalkinrightnow

New customer walks in, guy compliments how my earrings make me look and leaves.

He came back in like 5 minutes later, some guy outside heckled "why's that old guy staring?" and he left again for good.

Then my boss came in late as hell for the shift to be covered and criticized me for making a customer wait while I ran the store by myself all day. Haha.

[Gamedog]

Running a rotating cutter head in a pipe with a camera and having a rat run towards it and get chopped up on camera

[Clove Darkwave]

1 minute ago, Gamedog said:

Running a rotating cutter head in a pipe with a camera and having a rat run towards it and get chopped up on camera

Wow.

[Gamedog]

Never had someone be creepy to me but I have had people literally try to do my job for me

 

ny roommates seen two people die on the job but I can't remember how. I think some heavy metal fell on one off a shelf and crushed him

i don't want to ask him again how they died.

Edited March 17, 2016 by Gamedog

[Endless/Nameless]

Me and my dad both worked as dishwashers at a semi-fancy restaurant for a time. We were both extremely good at our job.

The cook was an awful, awful man. 
He would antagonize young waitresses to the point of tears just for fun. 
He hated us.

We found out later after we quit that he kept a notepad record of all the times we went to the bathroom.
What a Creep.

4 minutes ago, Gamedog said:

Running a rotating cutter head in a pipe with a camera and having a rat run towards it and get chopped up on camera

Nice.

I also have rat story.
I saw one in the dishwashing area once.
I crouched down to watch it; got within about 3 or 4 feet I believe.
He was a cute, fuzzy little fella but had dead eyes of death.

[Clove Darkwave]

I get a lot of that, and they're often wrong too.

Here's another one:

Flannel Hipster: What are these made out of?

Clove: Coconut Wood.

Flannel Hipster: [Smugly] Looks more like palm  to me.

Clove: ...

[Gamedog]

3 minutes ago, Endless/Nameless said:

 

We found out later after we quit that he kept a notepad record of all the times we went to the bathroom.
What a Creep.

Wtf???? Maybe that's why he made them cry cause he wanted to make them go to bathroom to cry

and I like rats, they're cuties

one time behind work I found a toad who was trapped in a plastic bag and I released him, he was cute. Another time we were sucking out rocks/leaves/debris from a loading dock drainage trough and found a baby snapping turtle just before he got sucked up. Put him in an empty coffee cup til we were done and then let him go in a ditch. I still have a pic of him somewhere, he was like 2 inches long

[ZorroValdez]

I had a lady yell at me because we didn't sell happy meals. I work for a pizza place.

I've also taken deliveries and folks are usually just astounded that I don't carry change for a $100 dollar bill. : /

Edited March 17, 2016 by ZorroValdez

[Gamedog]

Just now, ZorroValdez said:

I had a lady yell at me because we didn't sell happy meals. I work for a pizza place.

I've also taken deliveries and folks are usually just astounded that I don't carry change for a $100 dollar bill. : /

What's the weirdest people you've dealt with on delivery?

[Clove Darkwave]

7 hours ago, Endless/Nameless said:

We found out later after we quit that he kept a notepad record of all the times we went to the bathroom.
What a Creep.

 

I wish I had a recording of the time my co-workers and I watched a dude outside go completely apeshit on a gumball machine that ate his quarter. He eventually ripped it off of the mounting after denting it.

Clove: "TWENTY FIIIIIIIIIVE CEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNTTTTSSS RRRRRRAAARRRRGGHHHH"

Co-workers giggle madly

[ZorroValdez]

Just now, Gamedog said:

What's the weirdest people you've dealt with on delivery?

Well, there was the time that I arrived at this one house with a glass screen door, and I walk up to the porch to see this girl giving her boyfriend a handjob on the couch. The dude just... flew over the back of it and skittered out of view while his girlfriend was laughing hysterically. I asked her to get some sanitizer before she paid me for their food.

[WileyWarWeasel]

All the places I worked at never had water coolers, only taps with hot and cold water.

[Clove Darkwave]

1 minute ago, ZorroValdez said:

Well, there was the time that I arrived at this one house with a glass screen door, and I walk up to the porch to see this girl giving her boyfriend a handjob on the couch. The dude just... flew over the back of it and skittered out of view while his girlfriend was laughing hysterically. I asked her to get some sanitizer before she paid me for their food.

Talk about poor time management.

[Endless/Nameless]

15 hours ago, Gamedog said:

Wtf????

We believe he was sending nightly reports to the head honcho lady in Canada who runs the place illegally.

[ZorroValdez]

Just now, Clove Darkwave said:

Talk about poor time management.

That's what I get for being hasty with my job.

[Clove Darkwave]

1 minute ago, ZorroValdez said:

That's what I get for being hasty with my job.

In some cases it's "delivery in under x minutes or it's free". Not often it's "delivery in x minutes or it's not free".

I'll see myself out. Too tired when I start making these kinds of jokes.

[GarthTheWereWolf]

So i work in maximum security mental hospital now.

There's a patient I work with. He's not a creep, (Though he has commit a violent crime which is why I work with him) but he is by far my favorite patient.

He's a big fat black dude. Extremely schizophrenic and delusional. Thinks hes Satan and always talks in a deep growly voice. Usually when I see him on the unit, he'll puff himself up, walk over and say to me in his growly voice, "Garth, I have come for your soul. Prepare yourself."

To which with a straight face I reply, "Oh yea? Well I'm a state worker, so if you want my soul it's going to cost you cash money. We don't do anything for free."

At this point he visibly deflates and says in a whiney high pitched voice, "Awwwww man. I don't have any money though."

And I'm all, ;|  "Sorry dude. Cash money."

At this point he'll almost always say, "Fuck!" and wander off. Sometimes he'll try to bargain for my soul with crappy patient items like ramen packs or peanut butter crackers, but I'll have none of that. Cash money.

 

It cracks me up every time.

[Strongbob]

Ran over my finger with an industrial sewing machine one time. Luckily my fingernail deflected the needle enough that it didn't sew through my bone. Just pulled out the threads and requested the rest of the day off.  

[PastryOfApathy]

I'll have a few but I'll give one for now.

Back in ye olden days (2014) when I worked at Wal-Mart I was the official "photo lab guy" which pretty much meant I worked in electronics, except I had to work 3x as hard as everyone else for the same exact shitty pay while having to explain to angry old people why I still didn't have envelopes after 3 weeks. Also they never trained you properly so you would occasionally get orders that you literally could not fill because no one knew how to do it or you didn't even have the supplies to do it in the first place. Also my supervisor was a bitchy, fat dyke so fuck her.

Anyways on black Friday (which he had to work no matter what otherwise "it wouldn't look good for you") I was naturally assigned at electronics, which was a total shock to everyone involved. As I was attempting to survive the onslaught I suddenly start hearing this obnoxious black lady bitching about me from the middle of the line for literally no reason, saying shit like "can u believe this kid omg" over and over ad nauseam in that horrible "I'm trying to make it look like I don't want you to hear it, but I totally do" voice that shitty, passive aggressive people do all the time.

Eventually she comes to the counter demanding I hold an Xbox for her. Now our store policy forbids us from doing this but typically we did it anyways since who fucking cares, but in any event I held onto it for her and overall pretended like I didn't hear her literally 30 seconds ago call me a fucking retard. A little bit later a genuinely nice couple asks if we have any more of a specific Xbox bundle we were selling at the time (I think it was the Assassin's Creed one but it doesn't really matter) because we apparently sold out.

Guess what Xbox cunty lady asked me to hold.

Long story short I sold away her bundle to someone who wasn't a total bitch and Christmas was saved. Unfortunately I didn't get to see her reaction since I was hiding in the shitter at the time, but seeing as we had literally zero Xbox's at this point there was only one way it could ended. So yeah, don't act like a stupid bitch then turn around and ask for favors because I will fuck your shit up if the opportunity arises. Just ask the guy who threatened to beat me up and followed me into the parking lot how his layaway went. You know the one I purposely mislabeled and dumped in a dark corner so he'll never get it.

Seriously be nice to us, we're people too.

[Strangefox32000]

Oh man. 

Lets see... This one time I caught a dude leafing through newspapers trying to swipe some primo coupons (fucking couponers!) and I watch this guy pull about five ad sets out of the newspapers I call out to him "hi, are you going to pay for those newspapers?" (and everyone around could see this happening) the guy goes ghost white and says "no" so I say "then please put the ads back"

numerous times I've walked into our front men's restroom and seen the handicap stall just ruined, like literally someone shit all over the stall, left a pair of ruined drawers on the floor, it was as if a hippopotamus had to muck spread (don't google that) and just went all over the stall.

And holy hell, every joker just HAS to give me the whole "if it doesn't scan its free, lol" bullshit. If we actually stood by that policy, incompetent file clerks would ruin the damn company.

Edited March 17, 2016 by Strangefox32000

[willow]

I'm doing my own thing at work stocking the shelves when this lady (who had to have been in her late 40's or early 50's) yells "Hey, Target worker" to me and like, waves me over to where she's standing. so I'm bracing myself for one of those classic retail hell stories. well..she first starts off by saying I'm apparently the only associate she could get a hold of in the probably 2 minutes she was standing there and then she asks me to take the storage container she's standing next to up to the front desk because they wouldn't fit in her cart. I take the container up to the desk and then go back to what I was doing.

fast forward about 30 minutes and I've started straightening up my zone for the night when I hear this unholy racket coming from the cashier lanes. I can't exactly tell what's going on only that some lady is pissed and that we 'shouldn't be allowed to treat customers like this' or whatever. this goes on for a good 10 minutes and then suddenly they request back up at the cash registers. I respond to the call and lo and behold it's the lady I helped earlier! she was trying to get her stuff marked down and kept going on and on about how the customer is always right and shit. I don't think she wound up buying any of the stuff she had either.

also she was eating some donuts and then left the half eaten box at the register.

[Alexxx-Returns]

I worked in a hospital before so a ton of stuff happens that just becomes normal really. Being punched on Christmas day was a highlight though.

I'd take a whole army of elderly people punching me for every Christmas and birthday to come, over my first ever job though. I had the co-worker from hell. The moment I started working in that department, I was getting MAJOR creeper vibes from him all the time and this made me feel on edge, but I don't like to judge so I put that to the back of my mind. He was so friendly to everyone else who worked there, telling jokes and being chatty with them, and then with me he'd just skulk around acting like a rainy day and micro-manage me. We had the same job title, we had managers who we reported to who were OUR managers but yeah.

The job wasn't TERRIBLE, and everyone knows that most shit jobs can be made or broken by who you work with. I mean, this creeper guy was on holiday for one week I was working there, and another guy was sent down to our department to replace him for the day, and we got along like a house on fire. We were the same age pretty much, we were doing the same subjects at school and we had similar interests, and he made it fun for me. And he shared the work, too - that was important. Creeper guy would take all the work and get me to "go tidy". So my job was to tidy the same ~10m by 10m area for like 9 hours (unless something unusual came up and then thankfully I'd actually HAVE something to do). There's only so much mess that gets made in any one day in an area of that size!!! But yeah, I digress. When there's no one to talk to in your ENTIRE work day, ever, and your co-worker scares you and creeps you out.... it's pretty shit to be working there even if it's not a terrible job.

So I left that job after about 2 or 3 months because I was terrified of going in for even 1 day a week. If I have to talk about "reasons for leaving" on job applications I just make something up but it was basically 99% because of that situation.

[Wrecker]

We were skidding up a section of 42" pipe yesterday, and when the side-boom let the weight off, a skid snapped in half scaring the living shit out of a coworker.

[LazerMaster5]

Once when I was in the concession stand, some drunk guy came in over from the sushi place in the mall and started bugging the person selling tickets. When she went to get the manager, the guy walked over to my terminal and started mumbling. As I have not had much experience with drunkards before, I assumed he wanted food. So I ask him if I could help him, and he starts muttering "Turb". Then the manager asks him to leave and calls the police so they can safely take him home. A fellow employee was sent to the front doors to make sure this dude wouldn't come back in, and the dude tried bribing the employee and failed. The police arrived and took care of things, and that was that. While there are lots of boring moments at Atlas Cinemas, this experience was anything but boring.

[Kinare]

I have a lot of stories from my near 5 years in retail, but I can't remember a lot of them until they just randomly pop into my head. Here are a couple I remember right now~

One time a customer came in and told me he thought some creepy guy was masturbating in the parking lot. I told my boss, she went out to investigate after the customer basically begged her to get him to stop because "children are here" and that made it extra creepy I guess. Welp, she went, and it turns out that guy was waiting to pick up one of the stock workers. Was he doing "it"? The verdict is still out on that. She didn't catch him in the act, but I do wonder why the customer thought the guy was in fact doing that.

Later at night, close to closing I believe, we had someone try to steal an entire cart full of groceries. Our security guy just happened to be there (he was only there on certain days) so he caught the person going out the door. Apparently this person came in with a bunch of grocery bags and as he/she shopped he/she was putting things into the bags. The security guy had apparently followed him/her around the store all ninja-like trying to figure out if they were indeed going to steal. In the past have had legit people do the same thing, maybe trying to stick to how much they could carry in a set amount of bags or whatever, so it wasn't worth confronting the person there and then. Plus, if you let them walk out of the door they technically "stole" it and got punished harder. I had to ring up everything they stole so they had the voided receipt to use against him/her.

A common visitor to the store was a somewhat old lady who had horrible hygiene, always overdid the black mascara/eyeshadow, and had a very creepy son who often came with her. She lived off of gov benefits. She used to like to come talk to us service desk peeps because we were nice to her and I did feel badly for her because I knew she was poor and she said her son was mean to her (though I've only ever heard her yell at her son, so she may not have been truthful about that). She had been caught on multiple occasions spraying herself with Febreeze or similar products and using the deodorant, then putting it back... Surprisingly enough, she was never caught stealing (other than of course doing the above, because that is technically stealing).

And one good story to wrap it up. One of our usual lotto players won $500 one time and she gave me $20. That $20 saved my ass too that night because I was completely out of gas, I would have been super lucky to make it home without it even though I only lived 15 minutes away.

Edited March 18, 2016 by Kinare

[Vallium]

Well today a woman walked in talking angrily on the phone, buying beer and cigarettes, she seemed in a rush and picking coins out of her palm, I thought I'd be helpful by picking out the amount she needed but she snapped angrily at me, then as I was tucking coins in the register prodceeded to yell at me "hurry up Ive got an angry man waiting"...I had no idea how to respond to that, really just "Sorry about that"

 

i feel kind of sad afterwards...like I just witnessed something I couldnt control or do anything about, like every customer she's just someone that comes and goes and I have no bearing on their lives but to get them their commodities.

Edited March 18, 2016 by WolfNightV4X1

[Vallium]

TSome noteworthy past experiences in the pet industry (among many) was the time a cat got stuck in the wall (I made a thread here on that:

 

) and the time the owners of an aggressive dogs didnt secure the cage and the dog got out while I was in the kennel.

my coworkers and I eventually had to wait out in the lobby with all the doors shut and call the owners back to secure it. I think the dog turned out to not actually be that aggressive, if it had wanted to it could have mauled me when it got out, I didnt even know it was her at first until I closed in on her and had to stop right away, all she did was ignore me and wander around, felt kind of bad for her because I could tell she was most certainly looking for her owners and was standing outside the door where they left when I noticed her. 

Edited March 18, 2016 by WolfNightV4X1

[Yarra]

41 minutes ago, WolfNightV4X1 said:

Well today a woman walked in talking angrily on the phone, buying beer and cigarettes, she seemed in a rush and picking coins out of her palm, I thought I'd be helpful by picking out the amount she needed but she snapped angrily at me, then as I was tucking coins in the register prodceeded to yell at me "hurry up Ive got an angry man waiting"...I had no idea how to respond to that, really just "Sorry about that"

 

i feel kind of sad afterwards...like I just witnessed something I couldnt control or do anything about, like every customer she's just someone that comes and goes and I have no bearing on their lives but to get them their commodities.

By chance was she fat and ugly?

[FlynnCoyote]

Had a piece of plywood board get jammed in the panel saw halfway though due to one of the fences not being tightened properly. Blade jammed for about half a second before chewing though and sending splinters flying like bullets directly backwards. If I hadn't been reaching for the emergency off button one of them would have skewered my neck.

I've also seen a plumber apprentice put a hole through a pipe trying to fix it to the wall. Lots of flooding, and most of our freshly installed kitchen cabinets had to be replaced.

[Vallium]

7 hours ago, Yarra said:

By chance was she fat and ugly?

She was middle aged, weary and pissed with dirty blond hair and had a southern drawl

[Gamedog]

I mentioned this in the Discord chat but I'll post here too

 

my roommate was loading sheet metal into a truck and a piece slid and hit his hand, cutting it open, and you could see bone

[Spot]

I have a few, don't know if I'll share them though, they're pretty bad. Lets just say I've seen it all. 

[Vallium]

32 minutes ago, Mr. Fox said:

I have a few, don't know if I'll share them though, they're pretty bad. Lets just say I've seen it all. 

Well do share...unless its bad its against-the-rules-to-share-because-its-illegal bad

[Guest]

45 minutes ago, Mr. Fox said:

I have a few, don't know if I'll share them though, they're pretty bad. Lets just say I've seen it all. 

Yeah come on tell us old man

[Catilda Lily]

I recently quit my old job because I wasn't happy with how the place was being run. The main boss was almost fired by the higher ups because he was having parties at his house with some of the underage employees( who also happened to be promoted by him.) I found out that after I quit 3 other managers also quit. I ended up applying and getting a new job the same day.

I burned my hand really bad on a fryer basket that someone had moved after they left it over the fryer. I had to take the rest of the day off and was lucky enough that it happened right before my normal two days off. It blistered horribly. No scars though

My friend almost tipped a riding lawn mower while mowing through an orchard. I think someone else ran over a snake in the ditch with the mower.

When our air conditioning wasn't working in the kitchen we had a girl pass out and hit her head on the line behind her.

We've called the cops quite a few times for many different reasons. The most recent was because some lady was locked in the bathroom for almost an hour, she wouldn't respond when someone knocked on the door, but there was a lot of perfume coming out from there. She eventually left and she left behind some drugs.

[Xaende]

In my first job out of college, at a large publishing company, I had the pleasure of working with someone who had fired 7 of my predecessors. She was constantly criticizing, snooping, glaring, yelling, sulking, telling lies about me etc. I spoke with human resources, but that didn't help. This lady was related to one of the higher-ups, so there wasn't much they could do. When the environment got so bad that I could no longer concentrate, rather than let them fire me, I emailed a letter of resignation to my boss and quit on the spot. In retrospect, I probably should have resigned gracefully and stuck around for two more weeks, but I was inexperienced and didn't know better. Live and learn.

 

[Wrecker]

14 hours ago, Gamedog said:

I mentioned this in the Discord chat but I'll post here too

 

my roommate was loading sheet metal into a truck and a piece slid and hit his hand, cutting it open, and you could see bone

Good lawdy, probably out of work for a bit then, eh? Stitches, tetanus shot and the works?

That reminds me, we had a guy that was just heading off to school, it was the last day of shift, and he was a regular toker. He was moving a pipe stand in front of a length of pipe to hold a fitting to get welded out, and when he went to put it down, one of its legs caught the ground and caught his finger between it and the stick of pipe.

His finger was fucked, like pissing blood through his glove right now kind of fucked, and he wanted to finish the day instead of having to report an incident and go for a piss test. Problem was, our carry-deck operator watched the whole thing, and being a union hand, he shut us down right away.

[Gamedog]

4 minutes ago, Wrecker said:

Good lawdy, probably out of work for a bit then, eh? Stitches, tetanus shot and the works?

That reminds me, we had a guy that was just heading off to school, it was the last day of shift, and he was a regular toker. He was moving a pipe stand in front of a length of pipe to hold a fitting to get welded out, and when he went to put it down, one of its legs caught the ground and caught his finger between it and the stick of pipe.

His finger was fucked, like pissing blood through his glove right now kind of fucked, and he wanted to finish the day instead of having to report an incident and go for a piss test. Problem was, our carry-deck operator watched the whole thing, and being a union hand, he shut us down right away.

No, he duct-taped it and went back to work, I yelled at him for it.

oh my god OH MY GOD OH MY

GOD

NO NO NO NO NO

[Derin Darkpaw]

@PastryOfApathy Having now spent seven years working for Walmart and counting truer words about that place have never been spoken.  The total lack of supplies and adequate training is endemic to that very place.  I can not count the number of times its just been me and two other managers poking at something trying to guess how it worked because apparently no one in the entire store except for one person knew how some basic feature worked, and of course that person just isn't there at the time. 

I once had a customer threatened to sue me and call the cops just because we didn't have any large plastic bags.  At which point I just pointed out that we have an off duty police officer at the door and he can go ahead and tell him all about our lack of bags.

I can't even begin to count the number of times I got into arguments with customers over our return policy because apparently some of these fuckers think we need to explicitly spell out every single contingency for every different item in the store or our policy wasn't valid and whats more they expect us to post all of it on their receipt and on signs everywhere around the store.  If we did that every single inch of wall space would be covered with our policy and the receipts would be a mile long.

Though I don't know what good posting any of it would even do seeing as a customer once told me and I quote "how can you expect me to read signs."  Not that they were saying that they were illiterate just that they literally couldn't be bothered to read a fucking sign.

I have had customers wait in line at the service desk for well over 30 minutes just so that they could complain about their single can of soup being 10 cents more expensive then what the label on the shelf said.

Or there is all the times customers have to just keep talking about the most inane irrelevant bullshit ever.  This one customer cornered me and just kept talking about jig spinners.  Apparently we didn't have the right ones and he needed a lot of them.  You see jig spinners come in 4 different sizes ranging from 0 to 3.  This size refers to how big the blade is with 0 being the smallest and 3 being the largest.  Now the size 0 you don't need to replace as often so he didn't need a lot of those but the 3s and 2s went through pretty quick and he needed those in bulk. 

Did you know any of that about jig spinners?  Of course you didn't!  You are a sane person who has reasonable things to do with your time and now thanks to some random jag off I will never be able to forget these useless facts?

Also totally agree with you that finding ways to secretly dick over customers that have been jerks is one of the greatest pleasures of working retail. 

[Hikaru Okami]

I was a barista and this lady literally ordered the sweetest tea we have in stock and requested to add two cups of sugar. Ew. But that's not the best story I got.

There was an episode of my strange addiction about a lady that was obsessed with increasing her boob size. We met her....seeing MMM size boobs wasn't on my bucketlist, but it's complete now.

[DevilBear]

Waiting in the lounge at the heliport. First time working overseas, first time working off shore, first time in a helicopter. Pilot comes in for the safety briefing.

"Today we will be travelling in the Super Puma boys."

The room gets dead quiet.

Me, turning to a guy next to me- "uhh... what's wrong with the super puma?"

"They've been grounded for a while. Kept falling out of the sky."

That was the longest flight of my life.

[Zeke]

In 2014, had to deal with Heroin addicts passed out on the floor. One overdose case during the evening.

Sex in the Children' area in full view of the public. 

My mother and her troupe of musicians came when there was a bathroom drug bust.

Patron was stabbed while I was helping him by another patron.

Dead baby found in the toilet one morning, and had to close the library for forensics to do their job. Yeah...

One guy lost his stash of drugs that a security guard found. It was about 250 bucks worth of weed. The guy had the gall to ask security if he found a box anywhere. 

People dealing drugs in the stacks. It was a common occurrence. 

Fights. Usually with 6-7 kids beating up on a homeless man. Almost got myself arrested because one of the kids was going to use a broken beer bottle shard on the man for not buying this kid beer and I stepped in to aid the man. 

Creepy Stalker guy wearing the stereotypical Fedora and crap stalking me through the stacks. He started stalking me when my co-worker and I were talking WoW shop and my Co-worker wanted to raid. Creepy Stalker guy interrupted us wanting to join the guild and kept lording over some of the more minor things like "I've killed Normal LK once :VVV". He stalked me on my bus route until I confronted him. After that, he disappeared.

Neo-Nazi pedo threatened to skin me when I called the police on him for looking at child porn.

Old lady beating the shit out of my co-worker for no explicit reason than "I want to".

Held at gunpoint because I wouldn't let a guy "Jack off"

Weird foot fetish guy jacking off.

Furries getting themselves banned from the library for looking at porn, which subsequently led to putting FA behind a filter. 

 

[Zaraphayx]

47 minutes ago, Zeke said:

In 2014, had to deal with Heroin addicts passed out on the floor. One overdose case during the evening.

Sex in the Children' area in full view of the public. 

My mother and her troupe of musicians came when there was a bathroom drug bust.

Patron was stabbed while I was helping him by another patron.

Dead baby found in the toilet one morning, and had to close the library for forensics to do their job. Yeah...

One guy lost his stash of drugs that a security guard found. It was about 250 bucks worth of weed. The guy had the gall to ask security if he found a box anywhere. 

People dealing drugs in the stacks. It was a common occurrence. 

Fights. Usually with 6-7 kids beating up on a homeless man. Almost got myself arrested because one of the kids was going to use a broken beer bottle shard on the man for not buying this kid beer and I stepped in to aid the man. 

Creepy Stalker guy wearing the stereotypical Fedora and crap stalking me through the stacks. He started stalking me when my co-worker and I were talking WoW shop and my Co-worker wanted to raid. Creepy Stalker guy interrupted us wanting to join the guild and kept lording over some of the more minor things like "I've killed Normal LK once :VVV". He stalked me on my bus route until I confronted him. After that, he disappeared.

Neo-Nazi pedo threatened to skin me when I called the police on him for looking at child porn.

Old lady beating the shit out of my co-worker for no explicit reason than "I want to".

Held at gunpoint because I wouldn't let a guy "Jack off"

Weird foot fetish guy jacking off.

Furries getting themselves banned from the library for looking at porn, which subsequently led to putting FA behind a filter. 

 

I am disappointed by the lack of piss buckets in this post.

[Chrysocyon]

Oh boy.  I have several horrific fecal matter related stories that I could share if that's not too risqué for these forums.

[Brazen]

2 hours ago, Zeke said:

Furries getting themselves banned from the library for looking at porn, which subsequently led to putting FA behind a filter. 

What is it with furfags jerking it at the library. When I was a volunteer librarian there was this hamplanet of a beast  that came in and routinely looked at furry porn and imvu bullshit. She threatened to kill me over facebook and I got her banned from our branch.

Edited March 19, 2016 by Brazen

[Gamedog]

Shit mushrooming out of basement floor drain cause woman clogged drain and kept flushing, clog was removed, and cleaned up shit even though out of work range

woman called in to complain, said her shit wasn't cleaned up well enough

----

 

Woman called and complained cause employee didn't ask her cat how she was feeling and if she was having a good day. Next time employee went (cat lady became infamous), got on knees and asked cat how she was doing 

lady called in with ecstatic review and was solid customer for years afterwards 

Edited March 19, 2016 by Gamedog

[Zeke]

1 hour ago, Zaraphayx said:

I am disappointed by the lack of piss buckets in this post.

No pissbuckets for 2014-15. It was "get crunk and get head" year. 

1 hour ago, Brazen said:

What is it with furfags jerking it at the library. When I was a volunteer librarian there was this hamplanet of a beast  that came in and routinely looked at furry porn and imvu bullshit. She threatened to kill me over facebook and I got her banned from at our branch.

lololol Good. Fucking furries.

[Strangefox32000]

I found a spoon in our restroom with the bottom all charred. Left it right where I found it 'cause I wasn't getting involved in THAT. 

Early today, this guy comes through my check lane gets a pack of smokes. I scan it and, keeping with a company policy only I observe, hold onto them until payment processed. Guy holds out his hand for the smokes and I explain the policy and he cusses me out for not giving him his Cigarettes. Guy leaves and as soon as he was out of earshot I say under my breath "ASSHOLE!"

[Diani]

I was working a checkout line, some old man told me I had ruined his day. 

My first week of working a checkout line without someone looking over my shoulder, a lady had a seizure. I guess she's a regular customer and most of the employees know what to do. From what my team leader told me her husband is a piece of shit that sits in the car and makes her come into the store.

[Gamedog]

My coworkers all think that the reason why I get no sleep is because every night I stay up until 4am watching porn