I'm a self-hating nerd. :[

[Kellie Gator]

Semi-serious thread, I guess...? I'm not sure. But I've been thinking about this a lot.

A small convention was held in my town this weekend, focused around card, board and miniature games (or whatever games like Warhammer 40000 are called). Not my kind of games 'cause I'm more into the video variety but I figured it might be fun to go to and it gave me a chance to try some Warhammer 40k, something I always wanted to get into but couldn't because it's expensive and convoluted.

I had some fun but I also felt a bit of disgust and kind of out of place. I kept thinking to myself, these are adults, and I can understand adults getting into gritty stuff like Warhammer, but a lot of these people act like kids, despite being grown men and women, and some of them would obsess over these cute plushies in a way that just felt unnatural and embarrassing while other who were at least my age or older were playing bizarre card games for children about munchkins, whatever the fuck that is. And then there's the painfully long rulebooks for all the games there, and with Warhammer there's also all the assembling and painting and I'm like, how can grown people with jobs have time for this?! Aren't they busy with something... better?

But I suppose I need to be more introspective. Am I really different from them? Or from nerds in general? I love weird kids cartoons like Dinosaucers or movies like The Land Before Time, I'm still a fan of some weird kids games like Gex and Sly Cooper. And I often scoff at other geeks' obsession with continuity and time lines and shit, and yet... I'm a Metal Gear fangirl, I obsess over Metal Gear to the point where I was not able to fully enjoy Metal Gear Solid V because I think it was so dumb and raised so many questions in the series timeline. I've spent about 250-300 hours on the damn game.

I'm also a massive Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles fangirl. And a Turok fangirl. And a Legacy of Kain fangirl. And a fucking furry writing a novel about talking reptiles.

And yet, I don't feel like I belong with other geeks. I often talk trash about my sis for being a basement dweller who just plays Starcraft or shitty MOBAs all day but is this just me being a hypocrite?

Agh, I forgot where I'm going with this. I have issues and hate nerds even though I probably qualify as one.

[AshleyAshes]

To be frank, I think you should try to find a way to let go and just have fun.  It was a convention of games and toys where the adults there choose to goof off, have fun, and enjoy themselves.  Being serious and mature is for work and stuff, if it's a hobby, enjoy it as much as you want, it's all harmless after all.

Frankly, I feel that too many people worry over what the 'right way' to have fun is or something.  If you're not hurting anyone and enjoying yourself, you're doing it right.

Edited October 25, 2015 by AshleyAshes

[MissFleece]

With everything, there is a need of moderation. Hobbies are great! They're great for relaxing you at the end of the day, getting your mind off other things. However, when people obsess is where lines get drawn. 

If you can make a life out of your hobby, that's different. If you've got shrines, can't talk about anything else, and have no way to connect to people who are not part of your hobby anymore, you need to do some serious introspection. 

Basically, I feel ya. Some people are just over the top, and it's okay to not feel connected to them anymore. Try to expand your horizons and maybe you'll have some friends with normal hobbies, lol. 

[PastryOfApathy]

You just have to find the right group of people who strike the right "balance". I'm like you in a lot of ways, I can't stand that level of sperging and I just kind of die inside whenever I'm forced to deal with it since it's fucking embarrassing. I'm not gonna claim to have done it because I'm a loser with no friends, but you just have to find people who are on the same level of sperginess as you.

[Kellie Gator]

With everything, there is a need of moderation. Hobbies are great! They're great for relaxing you at the end of the day, getting your mind off other things. However, when people obsess is where lines get drawn. 

If you can make a life out of your hobby, that's different. If you've got shrines, can't talk about anything else, and have no way to connect to people who are not part of your hobby anymore, you need to do some serious introspection. 

Basically, I feel ya. Some people are just over the top, and it's okay to not feel connected to them anymore. Try to expand your horizons and maybe you'll have some friends with normal hobbies, lol. 

Well, a lot of people say that being a geek/nerd is all about being obsessive, but I guess you can go too far there. Like when you don't fucking shower like my sis.

...I should stop talking about that but I can never let it go, she stayed at my place for five days without showering and also seemed to have no idea over what's appropriate to talk about and what isn't, I don't want to fucking listen to someone go on about their damn periods and birth control pills. Fucking bitch.

You just have to find the right group of people who strike the right "balance". I'm like you in a lot of ways, I can't stand that level of sperging and I just kind of die inside whenever I'm forced to deal with it since it's fucking embarrassing. I'm not gonna claim to have done it because I'm a loser with no friends, but you just have to find people who are on the same level of sperginess as you.

I think my problem is more to find people I can... identify with. They're so similar and yet so alien.

Maybe that's what you were trying to say. I'm dumb.

[AyGee]

I feel a bit of context is important in this situation.  Table top gaming and console/computer gaming are entirely different beasts.

That Munchkin game?  It's a game that's a parody of how immature/power-gaming players in a pen and paper RPG screw each other over for the best loot and experience.  The colloquial term for such a player is 'munchkin,' and the card game itself became popular because of its humor and quick play time.

Warhammer 40,000?  Well, there are varying levels of obsessiveness, but part of it is the character of the game.  The most iconic organization within its universe is the Imperium of Mankind; imagine fundamentalist, Catholic space-nazis, and it gives you a better idea of why a lot of fans will end up spouting off litanies and adulations to the God Emperor of Mankind as trash-talk during games.

A lot of the humor and styling of traditional gaming has its own set of in-jokes, and to the outside observer this could all seem kind of weird.  It's like a normal person walking in on an anime-convention.  That's not to say -all- the behavior is excusable.  Any large enough group within a fandom will always have 'that guy.'

Edited October 25, 2015 by AyGee
Linked to 'that guy' and grammars

[Zaraphayx]

 

I had some fun but I also felt a bit of disgust and kind of out of place. I kept thinking to myself, these are adults, and I can understand adults getting into gritty stuff like Warhammer, but a lot of these people act like kids, despite being grown men and women, and some of them would obsess over these cute plushies in a way that just felt unnatural and embarrassing while other who were at least my age or older were playing bizarre card games for children about munchkins, whatever the fuck that is. And then there's the painfully long rulebooks for all the games there, and with Warhammer there's also all the assembling and painting and I'm like, how can grown people with jobs have time for this?! Aren't they busy with something... better?

What losers! living life the way they want and spending their income on things that make them happy with little to no concerns for the judgment that normies and failed-normies alike level upon them for deigning to engage in hobbies most can't understand! Then they get together and socialize with other like-minded humans with similar interests and passtimes???

What a bunch of manchildren. I'm going to write an essay about it on an online forum community for sexual deviants!

[Kellie Gator]

Warhammer 40,000?  Well, there are varying levels of obsessiveness, but part of it is the character of the game.  The most iconic organization within its universe is the Imperium of Mankind; imagine fundamentalist, Catholic space-nazis, and it gives you a better idea of why a lot of fans will end up spouting off litanies and adulations to the God Emperor of Mankind as trash-talk during games.

I said I get Warhammer, I always wanted to get into it but wasn't able to for money reasons and me not liking assembling and painting much. But man, it's a cool universe. I especially like the Tau, I even had that sub-par Fire Warrior FPS from about ten years ago. Those were the days.

I guess I could settle on Warhammer 40k video games but none of them seem to really emulate the actual, real life game very well. I thought it was kinda neat when I played it.

What losers! living life the way they want and spending their income on things that make them happy with little to no concerns for the judgment that normies and failed-normies alike level upon them for deigning to engage in hobbies most can't understand! Then they get together and socialize with other like-minded humans with similar interests and passtimes???
What a bunch of manchildren. I'm going to write an essay about it on an online forum community for sexual deviants!

They act like they're all 11 or younger, though.

But I'm not saying I'm right. I'm... probably not. Just weird.

[AshleyAshes]

You're trans, you already came to terms with accepting yourself and doing what you want with yourself on the gender front, regardless of any negative opinions that others would have.  So why shun others for having silly fun at a table top games convention during their time off?  Why repress yourself on that front to the point that you call yourself 'self hating'?

[Zaraphayx]

    They act like they're all 11 or younger, though.

But I'm not saying I'm right. I'm... probably not. Just weird.

I think you forget where you are.

Furries are on the top of the list of people who habitually fall short of acting their age.

You yourself routinely engage in behavior that most normal people would consider unbecoming. Obsessively talking smack about your sister online because she doesn't behave how you want her to is something that stopped being a thing for most of us when we became adults.

So what if they're a bit spergy? If it's that much of a deal-breaker than don't be friends with them and go do something else.

I speak as someone who can't stand to be around most geeks either.

[DrDingo]

This kinda reminds me of my daily life around my school friends.

In my free periods, I like to sit down with a book and start working. But everyone around me is chanting excitedly whilst playing a game of Yu-Gi-Oh or D&D.
Which kinda led me to put in headphones to isolate myself.

And all the while, these people struggle to understand how other people are doing better in their subjects.

[Kellie Gator]

I think you forget where you are.
Furries are on the top of the list of people who habitually fall short of acting their age.

You yourself routinely engage in behavior that most normal people would consider unbecoming. Obsessively talking smack about your sister online because she doesn't behave how you want her to is something that stopped being a thing for most of us when we became adults.

So what if they're a bit spergy? If it's that much of a deal-breaker than don't be friends with them and go do something else.

I speak as someone who can't stand to be around most geeks either.

I guess my issue is more that I don't understand how anyone can like these obnoxious people. They're annoying.

Not saying I'm right, I'm probably not. I just kind of have a knee-jerk reaction to these people.

[#00Buck]

Another uptight person who needs to chill. 

Let people enjoy their games. 

Go back into the basement. It's where you belong. 

[Bloodshot_Eyes]

Don't grow up, it's a trap. 

People act like kids in their off time because being an adult sucks. 

Nobody "grows up" they just learn how to act in public, We're all still children on the inside. When we're playing with toys we like we fuckin' PLAY! At least if we're unashamed of our own childishness. 

Idk

[FlynnCoyote]

The problem you observed occurs in every fandom, but it seems particularly out of place among wargamers and the like. I play 40k, even after the hobby has gone downhill lately, and I remember some awesome tantrums at a few tournaments over the years.

It happens when people take their hobby or fandom too seriously, and lose the ability to see the lighter side of it. Particularly in how it must look form an outside perspective. Just remember that ultimately it's to have fun, so don;t let anything take away from that.

[Alexxx-Returns]

We're always told "act your age", and shit, and that's why society at large views these games and things as being childrens' activities. And then we get weird looks for expressing our joy at them. I think that's just society having a really rigid idea of how adults are meant to act. If that wasn't how adults acted at least in some cases, why would the "geek" community be as big as it is? Why would we have conventions filled with thousands of grown ass adults "acting like kids"? Because we do act like kids in a lot of cases. And I personally think that if it makes ya happy, and no one's getting hurt (and the bills are getting paid), then go nuts.

When I got my Mario mushroom tattoo my dad scoffed at it because he thought I should have gotten something more mature and age-appropriate. I mean, aside from being pissed off at the time because he said that, I'm generally just laughing. Again, it makes me happy so I'm gonna happily have it.

[Kellie Gator]

Don't grow up, it's a trap. 

People act like kids in their off time because being an adult sucks. 

Nobody "grows up" they just learn how to act in public, We're all still children on the inside. When we're playing with toys we like we fuckin' PLAY! At least if we're unashamed of our own childishness. 

Idk

I can't say I sympathize, the first 15 years of my life were fucking horrible and I'm way better off now than then. And you can enjoy something without acting so... weird.

And... I dunno. Nerds perplex me. We've also got other types of nerds and just accept their nerdiness and what fucking happens next is shit like GamerGate or some Swedish basement dweller killing people with a sword because that's the kind of socially retarded culture he was involved in.

Frankly, I just feel a lot of discomfort and resentment about the whole thing.

Bleh, I made myself depressed now.

[Luka]

It feels like every thread of yours is a way to vent at your sister, or "people like her".

Five bucks say you hate these people because they remind you of her, somehow.

Edited October 26, 2015 by Luka

[Kellie Gator]

It feels like every thread of yours is a way to vent at your sister, or "people like her".

Five bucks say you hate these people because they remind your of her, somehow.

I'd say no but maybe I'm just delusional or something, idfk.

I think going to the con had the opposite effect of what I had hoped. I'm no fun and I need halp.

[Naesaki]

Kellie you focus way too much on the negatives of everything in life, hence you end up with such a jaded view of everything that you can't seem to end up finding enjoyment or satisfaction with anything.

Just relax and enjoy yourself, the people at those places are around others who they can let their hair down and just have pure mindless fun, nothing wrong with that, as long as they still do everything else in life that equates to being a civilised person of society :v

[Kellie Gator]

Kellie you focus way too much on the negatives of everything in life, hence you end up with such a jaded view of everything that you can't seem to end up finding enjoyment or satisfaction with anything.

Just relax and enjoy yourself, the people at those places are around others who they can let their hair down and just have pure mindless fun, nothing wrong with that, as long as they still do everything else in life that equates to being a civilised person of society :v

You're probably right, maybe I've just internalized a lot of bad shit, 'cause I've been treated badly all my life, people saying I'm weird and act weird and that I'm a horrible person or whatever, so when I see people who act even more inappropriately than me and get away with it I'm just like... what the fuck? How is this okay now?

I have a lot of things I need to unlearn, probably.

[Sidewalk Surfboard]

You're probably right, maybe I've just internalized a lot of bad shit, 'cause I've been treated badly all my life, people saying I'm weird and act weird and that I'm a horrible person or whatever, so when I see people who act even more inappropriately than me and get away with it I'm just like... what the fuck? How is this okay now?

I have a lot of things I need to unlearn, probably.

Oh god I know that feel all too well. It sucks ass.

[MuttButt]

Sometimes I find myself silently judging or "cringing" at other people's behavior and hobbies, but then I remember that I'm the guy who is about to be the proud owner of a $500 cartoon dog suit. Who am I to knock what others are into? Especially if they love it and it's not hurting anybody, yaknow? I think it's important to have a little bit of perspective, Judge not lest ye be judged, treat others how you wanna be treated, yadda yadda yadda.

[AshleyAshes]

You're probably right, maybe I've just internalized a lot of bad shit, 'cause I've been treated badly all my life, people saying I'm weird and act weird and that I'm a horrible person or whatever, so when I see people who act even more inappropriately than me and get away with it I'm just like... what the fuck? How is this okay now?

I have a lot of things I need to unlearn, probably.

1) Fuck the people who told you 'Be Normal' till you felt ashamed of yourself.

2) Don't be envious of those who get to harmlessly enjoy themselves and have fun, try to be one of them rather than being what other people told you to be.

[Derin Darkpaw]

Warhammer 40k and Munchkin ewwww.  It always amazes me that such shitty games have managed to become so popular.  On behalf of tabletop gaming fans everywhere I truly apologize.

[Vallium]

If the hit TV show big bang theory is any indication..."nerds/geeks" are not some unpopular weirdo lowlifes/no lives who don't get laid and are some minority group.  (Because that immensely popular show is liked by most everyone anyways, some who aren't even 'nerds' by stereotypic virtue)

The "nerds are losers" thing must be a concept of the old days, because as far as I can tell literally everyone is a nerd in one thing or another. It's a broad spectrum. People are just naturally passionate about things whether it's educational or recreational.

I may still call myself a 'nerd' at times because of my dumb interests in various things, but all in all nobody is really that special snowflake with original niche interest in something that they think they are.

Edited October 26, 2015 by WolfNightV4X1

[Onnes]

It may just be that's simply not the kind of interaction and culture you actually enjoy. I know the applies to myself and many stereotypical nerd gatherings. The answer though, is to find something else to do. Beating yourself up over why you don't enjoy certain things, or worse, looking down on other people because they enjoy something you don't, is unproductive and unhealthy.

[Vallium]

1) Fuck the people who told you 'Be Normal' till you felt ashamed of yourself.

2) Don't be envious of those who get to harmlessly enjoy themselves and have fun, try to be one of them rather than being what other people told you to be.

You're probably right, maybe I've just internalized a lot of bad shit, 'cause I've been treated badly all my life, people saying I'm weird and act weird and that I'm a horrible person or whatever, so when I see people who act even more inappropriately than me and get away with it I'm just like... what the fuck? How is this okay now?

I have a lot of things I need to unlearn, probably.

You don't think those people get shit for their dumb hobbies either? They're weird, they act weird, at some point someone must've called them out on it. They do it anyways because it makes them happy, and they're clearly hanging out in places where other people do the same thing they like doing instead of hanging around people that'll scoff at them.

[Derin Darkpaw]

If the hit TV show big bang theory is any indication..

It is not any indication whatsoever of what actual nerd culture is like at all and it serves more to laugh at nerd culture rather then laugh with it.  There are plenty of good reasons why that show is almost universally reviled among nerds.

[Vallium]

It is not any indication whatsoever of what actual nerd culture is like at all and it serves more to laugh at nerd culture rather then laugh with it.  There are plenty of good reasons why that show is almost universally reviled among nerds.

Yeah well, it's popular because people start to think 'wow, nerds are cool', not so much because Im saying its good, and then it becomes an icon because people relate to some thing or another and they put literally every nerd trope in existence in it so that everyone has something to relate to.

Which backfires because you can tell they're trying too hard, get their facts off, and depend way too much on old, dumb stereotypes.

Edited October 26, 2015 by WolfNightV4X1

[Derin Darkpaw]

Yeah well, it's popular because people start to think 'wow, nerds are cool',

I highly doubt that any one would come away from watching Big Bang Theory thinking better of nerds.

[Vallium]

I highly doubt that any one would come away from watching Big Bang Theory thinking better of nerds.

my old roommate who never touched a video game, anime, game, or anything remotely in creative or fantasy aspect loved the show. She wasn't a nerd at all...

 

[Derin Darkpaw]

my old roommate who never touched a video game, anime, game, or anything remotely in creative or fantasy aspect loved the show. She wasn't a nerd at all...

 

Yes a lot of people who aren't nerds like the show.  The show's audience is almost entirely made up of people who are not nerds.  They like it because it makes fun of nerds while simultaneously being a normal sitcom that takes absolutely no risks.

[AshleyAshes]

A nerd fight over a Sitcom about nerds in a thread about feeling bad about being a nerd!  My ironymeter just blew a fuse!

[Onnes]

Yes a lot of people who aren't nerds like the show.  The show's audience is almost entirely made up of people who are not nerds.  They like it because it makes fun of nerds while simultaneously being a normal sitcom that takes absolutely no risks.

Many physicists in my department enjoy that show. We also have a graduate student who is essentially Sheldon.

[Troj]

You just have to find the right group of people who strike the right "balance". I'm like you in a lot of ways, I can't stand that level of sperging and I just kind of die inside whenever I'm forced to deal with it since it's fucking embarrassing. I'm not gonna claim to have done it because I'm a loser with no friends, but you just have to find people who are on the same level of sperginess as you.

Yep.

I'm somebody who is often the obvious duck out when I'm among muggles, and the most normal and socially competent person when I'm among geeks.

Various normies therefore have a tendency to make me feel self-conscious, awkward, ill-at-ease, anxious, and at the very worst, deeply sorry for even existing, while many geeks make me sigh and roll my eyes.

When I'm full of energy and good cheer, I might be willing to play "mother hen" or be a quasi-therapist for less-confident, less-competent, and less-socially-savvy geeks--but, other times, such geeks make me feel burned out and annoyed, and I start pining for the company of someone I don't have to babysit, counsel, or train. (The worst are dumb geeks, because I can forgive you for being quirky, odd, or awkward if you're at least bright and inquisitive. Second-worst are the geeks who grossly overestimate and are overly-impressed with their own intelligence.)

Geeking out itself is fine, as long as you maintain your sense of perspective, and are able to balance your geeky pursuits with other interests and your various responsibilities in life.

I think a good barometer when it comes to how much geekiness is "too much" is how much you sound like one of the people from Our Valued Customers. Another good barometer is whether your geekiness is grossly interfering with your ability to hold down a job, focus on school, set and pursue life goals, maintain your physical health, and/or forge and maintain amicable relationships with people who don't share your geeky interests.

Edited October 26, 2015 by Troj

[Vallium]

Yes a lot of people who aren't nerds like the show.  The show's audience is almost entirely made up of people who are not nerds.  They like it because it makes fun of nerds while simultaneously being a normal sitcom that takes absolutely no risks.

Yeah well it wasnt necessarily targeted at nerd hate either. The protagonists were main characters that focused on their life, that was essentially the point I was making. People who weren't nerds liked the characters, not hated them. why else do people walk around in bazinga and green lantern shirts?

 

The indication I was trying to make is the whole nerdstuff is not this bullied, hated subgroup. Literally everyone has some dumb niche interest they're a part of.

[Kellie Gator]

1) Fuck the people who told you 'Be Normal' till you felt ashamed of yourself.

2) Don't be envious of those who get to harmlessly enjoy themselves and have fun, try to be one of them rather than being what other people told you to be.

I wouldn't call it envy, I don't wanna fucking be like them at all, they make me CRINGE. I can't understand how anyone likes them. They're repulsive.

Warhammer 40k and Munchkin ewwww.  It always amazes me that such shitty games have managed to become so popular.  On behalf of tabletop gaming fans everywhere I truly apologize.

I dunno, I always thought Warhammer 40k was pretty cool but also, well, convoluted and expensive as fuck. Lore, rules, assembling models, painting models... fuck me, that's a lot of work. How do people

 

You don't think those people get shit for their dumb hobbies either? They're weird, they act weird, at some point someone must've called them out on it. They do it anyways because it makes them happy, and they're clearly hanging out in places where other people do the same thing they like doing instead of hanging around people that'll scoff at them.

Maybe 20 years ago like when I was in school that would've been the case but now these nerds are fucking celebrated and put on pedestals because they made fucking Minecraft or whatever.

We live in a very nerd-centric society and I'm getting tired of seeing less and less people behave properly. At least be fucking polite, have some awareness of the real world rather than your shitty board games or PC games and get in the fucking shower for fuck's sake.

...I'm in a terrible mood today.

[AshleyAshes]

I wouldn't call it envy, I don't wanna fucking be like them at all, they make me CRINGE. I can't understand how anyone likes them. They're repulsive.

When you say this, do you feel that you sound anything at all like the people who were giving you shit and telling you to 'be more normal'?

[Kellie Gator]

When you say this, do you feel that you sound anything at all like the people who were giving you shit and telling you to 'be more normal'?

Maybe. I don't know how I feel about this. I feel like these people are way worse than I've ever been, though. It's kinda making me understand how those who bullied me might've felt.

[AshleyAshes]

Maybe. I don't know how I feel about this. I feel like these people are way worse than I've ever been, though. It's kinda making me understand how those who bullied me might've felt.

I really hope you don't mean that you're starting to feel that those who bullied you were somehow justified...

[Kellie Gator]

I really hope you don't mean that you're starting to feel that those who bullied you were somehow justified...

I don't know. I often ask myself if the people who bullied me wondered what they were in for, how fucking socially retarded, memetic and childish society would become because everyone's a fucking a nerd completely disconnected from the real world now and would much rather spend time with their iPads than their fellow man.

But... I don't feel like I did anything wrong that made me deserving, though. I was just trying to mind my own business but if I was acting like all these nerds I've seen at cons or whatever... I would understand any potential disgust or mockery that would ensue.

[AshleyAshes]

I don't know. I often ask myself if the people who bullied me wondered what they were in for, how fucking socially retarded, memetic and childish society would become because everyone's a fucking a nerd completely disconnected from the real world now and would much rather spend time with their iPads than their fellow man.

But... I don't feel like I did anything wrong that made me deserving, though. I was just trying to mind my own business but if I was acting like all these nerds I've seen at cons or whatever... I would understand any potential disgust or mockery that would ensue.

Uh, wow.

Okay, to be clear, how do you know that the people you saw at this convention didn't already have their shit dealt with?  That they didn't go to work all week, didn't pay the rent, didn't make sure they had groceries, didn't pay their cellphone bill, or any of that grown up stuff all settled and taken care of before going to a table top game convention to have fun?

[Kellie Gator]

Uh, wow.
Okay, to be clear, how do you know that the people you saw at this convention didn't already have their shit dealt with?  That they didn't go to work all week, didn't pay the rent, didn't make sure they had groceries, didn't pay their cellphone bill, or any of that grown up stuff all settled and taken care of before going to a table top game convention to have fun?

What difference does it make if they did or not? But they do strike me as the isolated types. I dunno why else they would act like that.

[AshleyAshes]

What difference does it make if they did or not? But they do strike me as the isolated types. I dunno why else they would act like that.

So, you judged their entire life, including making assumptions as to weather they deal with their adult responsibilities, based on nothing more than their behavior at a convention center full of toys and games...

[Kellie Gator]

So, you judged their entire life, including making assumptions as to weather they deal with their adult responsibilities, based on nothing more than their behavior at a convention center full of toys and games...

I guess I did.

I won't act like I'm right. Just... this is how I feel, completely alienated, confused and revolted.

This is how I've felt about, geeks, nerds or whatever you wanna call 'em for the last five years or so.

[Dr. Doggo]

Let me be frank - You have a history of disparaging large groups of people over all sorts of things, particularly nerd groups. And you can be pretty mean about it to say the least. At the same time you have a history of always finding some kind of justification for not being around people.

Don't you think you're a bit too bitter towards other people in general and have such a low threshold for anything outside of your hopes and expectations that you end up throwing away opportunities with others without thinking long enough? I'm not gonna challenge what you like and dislike about these groups of people, nobody's perfect. Nobody you meet in the street is going to act the way you want or think or feel the way you want. Instead you find middle ground and go off that and find what fun you can have. If you're picky about who you become sorta-friends with, you won't have many, if any.

I used to go to neckbeard places and do neckbeard things. Did I find some of the people cringey there? Sure. Some of them were loud, some of them smelled wierd, some weren't great with personal space. Some of them talked very passionately about esoteric geek shit, it'd be embarassing to be around them anywhere other than the basement of a hobby shop, like the one we were conveniently in. And why be surprised about it anyway? A nerd club is going to be full of nerds. It's a safe space for nerds to indulge in and talk about nerd things. There's always gonna be shit about people/groups you don't like, but if you can have good honest friendly fun with them, why not? It's not that you have to become BFFs and have them bunk at your house or something.

Their way of bothering you isn't going to be sticking around. The fun part of there being a place to go to play tabletop games will. Even though Clyde annoys me with how close he sits to me and how loudly he talks about MLP and can't take the hint from my lack of interest, I sure can't wait to have that 4-man game of Imperial Guard vs Tyranids on the big table with him and the other guys.

[Kellie Gator]

Let me be frank - You have a history of disparaging large groups of people over all sorts of things, particularly nerd groups. And you can be pretty mean about it to say the least. At the same time you have a history of always finding some kind of justification for not being around people.

Don't you think you're a bit too bitter towards other people in general and have such a low threshold for anything outside of your hopes and expectations that you end up throwing away opportunities with others without thinking long enough? I'm not gonna challenge what you like and dislike about these groups of people, nobody's perfect. Nobody you meet in the street is going to act the way you want or think or feel the way you want. Instead you find middle ground and go off that and find what fun you can have. If you're picky about who you become sorta-friends with, you won't have many, if any.

I probably am and I should stop, I just have this voice in my head telling me "why is no one reacting, why is no one saying anything? This person doesn't shower, that person acts like he's five, this guy has no social skills whatsoever and that guy keeps talking about how much he hates women/feminists and sends death threats. And then there's the guy who who kills people with a sword and other basement dwelling subhumans just celebrate him."

I'm like... why does no one react? Why does it have to be me? It's like people don't have standards anymore.

Edited October 26, 2015 by Kellie Gator

[Dr. Doggo]

I probably am and I should stop, I just have this voice in my head telling me "why is no one reacting, why is no one saying anything? This person doesn't shower, that person acts like he's five, this guy has no social skills whatsoever and that guy keeps talking about how much he hates women/feminists and sends death threats. And then there's the guy who who kills people with a sword and other basement dwelling subhumans just celebrate them."

I'm like... why does no one react? Why does it have to be me? It's like people don't have standards anymore.

Looks like you're also quick to project characteristics of other people onto people you've just met.

People don't react because they're willing to be polite, tolerant, and be friendly in the hopes of getting by. People keep their opinions to themselves and if they want to complain they usually do it in the company of their close friends or the internet.

[Vallium]

Again, who says nobody is reacting? People are probably reacting in their heads, if not calling them out on it. Have you called anyone out to tell them they stink, have no social skills, or wont shut up? People do notice...and at some point other people have been bullied for it too, for those that do call them out on it. (bullying implies impolitely and harshly so, however.)

i want to say this kindly, but you sound like you live ina box only aware of your existence and not realizing other people feel the same way you do and react as you do, at least some of them. Everyone has different perspectives of what is and isnt tolerable.

Edited October 26, 2015 by WolfNightV4X1