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Stuff that annoys you in movies


Tyranno
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- Stories have a protagonist with no discernible personality with a married love interest with no personality with an abusive husband or  wife who, despite their shortcomings, is portrayed as actually making an effort and trying to be a decent person - in other words, at least resembling a real person. Its hard to root against them when the "good guys" are such non-entities they could be revealed to be robots and it would make the story more believable.

- Love interest type characters in general actually, because they're so rarely an actual character.

- Characters who "have it coming", in horror movies

- Jump "scares".

- The "final girl" cliche when used in a remake of a horror movie that originally had a male protagonist

- The "final girl" cliche when every major character is male

- The "final girl" cliche when the only female character is the cast is only distinguishable from most of the extras by being the only female in the cast'

- Teenagers as major characters in horror movies

-  Characters who "explain" things that should logically be beyond human understanding (eldritch abominations, alien abductions etc)

- "Based on a true story" followed by throwing blatant nonsense at the audience (e. g. in Paranormal Activity 2, apparently "real demon facts" take about thirty seconds or less to find, and have no chance of the search results bringing up artistic license from novels, tv shows, movies etc).

 

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Oh god, I hate 'based on a true story...but totally a made up story really' trope too.

  • People calling magazines "clips"
  • People firing weapons in enclosed spaces and not suffering permanent hearing damage
  • People instantly dying from a single gunshot wound to the stomach

Why, is a clip technically a different part of a gun?

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24 minutes ago, Saxon said:

Why, is a clip technically a different part of a gun?

A magazine holds ammunition and feeds it into a position to be fired. A clip simply holds ammunition and lacks a feed mechanism; they are typically used to reload magazines.

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I hate how people can just shoot the locks off of doors in movies.

I hate how guns never jam in movies.

I hate how cars always explode when they get flipped over and shit. Like every car is a Ford Pinto or some shit.

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CPR magically restarting people's hearts and brining them back to life. CPR by itself is unlikely to do that,  the purpose of CPR is to keep blood and oxygen flowing to the brain while you wait for paramedics to arrive so there's less of a chance of permanent brain or tissue damage.

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-Children that are amazingly smarter than the adults around them.  Also related: teenagers who are better equipped to save the day than professionals.

-people never having to reload.  Those clips only hold so many bullets ;)

-this is more common in tv shows: but the bumbling husband or the overly controlling wife.  Really just doesn't allow the character to develop or be a normal person.

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1 hour ago, DrGravitas said:

Hacking - Except that one time where they used a real trick and the one Jurassic Park because nostalgia and memes. "This is Unix! I know this!"

Toilet humor in comedies.

From what I know the Unix computer in Jurassic park was a SGI workstation (don't know what model) running IRIX.

The 3D file manager thing actually exists and is called fsn. Though it wasn't meant for everyday use, more as a tech demo.

I hate how car and motorbike chases seem to go perfectly smooth, even on things like stairs that would likely ruin the suspension.

How aircraft seem to defy physics so often.

How in movies a defibrillator will work perfectly regardless of how the victim's heart is, shocking only works if there is a screwed up rhythm to fix (providing it is one that may respond to that) so it won't do anything to sort out a  flatline.

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  • Unnecessary / gratuitous nudity and sex scenes.
  • Unnecessary comic relief, in a more serious or more dramatic plot.
  • The "kid appeal" character.
  • The "funny pet" character.
  • Romance that overtakes the rest of the movie's plot, or the character's development.
  • Movies where a girl's "character development" is centered around making her prettier.
  • Movies where a more masculine female character is only that way due to personal trauma.
  • Movies where a lot of the core fuckups and drama would be solved if people just talked more.
  • Badly-done or obvious CG effects.
  • Movies where the protag suddenly gets their guy / girl of choice, who had no interest in them prior, just because they "earned it."
  • Movies with supernatural elements (aliens, dinosaurs, etc) that focus more on the humans and their personal drama than the shit that's actually going on.
  • Female characters who run around / fight / etc in heels and uncomfortably restrictive or revealing clothing.
  • "Babies ever after" tropes.
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Pretty much everything about horror flicks. I get sick of the predictable tropes and shitty character archetypes and flaccid villains that couldn't scare a child.

Further here's a list of things that aren't scary that I'm sick of seeing in movies:

  • Masked killers. I like the psychology behind Jason Voorhees, but just like the copycats, he's not scary. He's a person in a mask. Sure I'd be scared if he was real because he's indestructible and I'd die, but on the big screen there's nothing I find less scary than an otherwise normal looking person who just happens to be invincible. Him and all the others don't look remotely scary other than "this guy's a clear threat". I've seen five Friday movies and while some tell a good plot, they never get a fearful reaction from me. 
  • Demented little girls. I'm tired of the haunting little girl in a dress with long hair, usually has a stuffed animal, and can inexplicably vanish or teleport. Stock posture, tired eyes (oh no, please, don't turn into demonic dark pits, I'm so scared and not expecting that aaaaaa 9-9), pale skin, ghastly voice. Zzzzz. Done a million times 
    I get that the idea is that children are the essence of purity and innocence and having that being corrupted is supposed to be chilling, but children aren't scary. The last demented little girl I saw was Evelyn in RE7 (great game), which wasn't a movie, I know but it's a great recent example of a tired trope. She wasn't scary. She was tryhard, cringey, predictable, and poorly voiced.
  • Zombies.
    Fuck. Off.

Other than that, the only thing that really bothers me I can think of are really shaky goddamn cameras in action scenes. Love the Avengers movies, but they're guilty of this. Like they want to hide something. It just makes it hard to tell what's going on.

6 minutes ago, Vae said:
  • The "funny pet" character.

CHRIST I hate this. Also the obnoxious hyperactive ADHD animal character in (usually bad) animated films. Like that dumb squirrel in that shitty movie Over the Hedge.

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When people in horror movies just stand there and scream, eventually getting eviscerated by the antagonist in the process. Like I don't know, maybe you should do a little something I like to call running for your life? I understand that they make it like this to easily kill off characters, but it's a boring and overused way to do it.

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8 minutes ago, Shiro said:

When people in horror movies just stand there and scream, eventually getting eviscerated by the antagonist in the process. Like I don't know, maybe you should do a little something I like to call running for your life? I understand that they make it like this to easily kill off characters, but it's a boring and overused way to do it.

Girls who run away in horror films don't look where they go and trip over logs. Every time.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Kids outperforming adults

heroes running around a hail of bullets and none of them hitting. Hitting a human sized mark from ~50m is ridiculously easy even when you hipfire

Women surviving and knowing everything just because woman® (Fucking Rey skywarlker REEEEEEEE)

Unbelievably stupid villains

 

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On 2/8/2017 at 0:42 PM, Antumbra said:

-people never having to reload.  Those clips only hold so many bullets ;)

eyetwitch.png

On 2/8/2017 at 3:18 PM, Tsuujou said:

 

  • Zombies.
    Fuck. Off.

Zombie movies make me think of things like the LA Riots. Maybe zombies are just an easy way to capture that hellish anarchy without some pompous fucking ass screaming "RACIST".

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Stereotypical weak females that strong male protagonists have to save. They always get captured in stupid ways.

Choppy dialogue.

Ten million jumpcuts during action scenes.

People who go down with one hit.

Stormtrooper level aim.

Sappy romantic subplots that feel incredibly forced.

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Shaky cams.
Any character that was only made 'strong'/'cool' to fit a quota, instead of actually having an interesting backstory or development that would make me give a shit about them.
Lack of trigger discipline triggers me.
Cars exploding from being shot at.
Gun 'wrongs' in general.
Shaky cams.
When a movie advertises itself as a movie about giant robots punching each other and it focuses on stupid squishy meatbags instead of the giant robots that aren't punching each other enough.

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On 2/8/2017 at 9:18 PM, Tsuujou said:

Pretty much everything about horror flicks. I get sick of the predictable tropes and shitty character archetypes and flaccid villains that couldn't scare a child.

Further here's a list of things that aren't scary that I'm sick of seeing in movies:

Sounds like you're sick of splatter movies. There's lots of character-driven and/or atmospheric films where the focus is on something other than who's dying next.

On 2/8/2017 at 9:12 PM, Vae said:
  •  
  • Movies where the protag suddenly gets their guy / girl of choice, who had no interest in them prior, just because they "earned it."

Because however much these movies try to convince us the love interest is an important character, she/he is only important in the way gold medals are important in a film about the Olympics.

On 2/8/2017 at 10:05 PM, Shiro said:

When people in horror movies just stand there and scream, eventually getting eviscerated by the antagonist in the process. Like I don't know, maybe you should do a little something I like to call running for your life? I understand that they make it like this to easily kill off characters, but it's a boring and overused way to do it.

Movies horror (usually splatter horror) that just hand everything to the villain.

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Flame physics, particularly the flamethrowers arc, they don't go straight

5'2 people performing acrobatics and slam dunking practically everything

the "edgy kid" always wearing the terminator shades

the pothead always being retarded through the whole movie, then being a rocket scientist at the point of no return and saving anyone

Drugs acting instantly

the Ravers always being overly flamboyant, and gay >no problem with being gay but for real, not all ravers are gay<

The goth kid becoming a badass or immune to PTSD inducing things because they are "used to it" i guess watching your best friend get ripped up is an everyday thing!

GRENADE DAMAGE! it's a grenade! not a bucket of nitroglycerin

The father is always the abusive one.

someone always forgets something at the time they need it.

the movie always finding ways to ruin the book.

Games that are crappily made in three months to ride the hype train of the movie

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20 minutes ago, Aeon said:

 

The goth kid becoming a badass or immune to PTSD inducing things because they are "used to it" i guess watching your best friend get ripped up is an everyday thing!

In many horror movies, especially wide theatrical releases, every character acts like this

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Computers that can digitally enhance grainy photos and blurry low-def video stills to a detail smaller than a grain or pixel in the original with UHD clarity.

Computers that know exactly what part of a picture anyone's talking about when they say, "Enhance."

Computers that can be reprogrammed on the fly by people speaking technobabble that couldn't answer a single question on any certification test.

Computers that ask for a password, show the password as it's being entered, and don't even ask for a username.

Computers that can upload viruses to alien computers, know that they're talking (successfully, mind you) to alien computers, and know that what they're uploading is a computer virus.

Computers that blank the local screen the instant a remote connection is lost.

Computers that can be hacked from half the world away even when turned off.

Computers in general that basically prove no one in Hollywood has ever set foot inside a Fry's Electronics or Office Depot once in their lives.

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39 minutes ago, ArielMT said:

Computers that can upload viruses to alien computers, know that they're talking (successfully, mind you) to alien computers, and know that what they're uploading is a computer virus.

Since it's obvious you're referring to Independence Day,  I feel I should point out the original script had a scene that explained how all modern technology -- especially computers -- was reverse engineered from the crashed alien fighter, but the scene was cut from the movie's final release.

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41 minutes ago, Victor-933 said:

Since it's obvious you're referring to Independence Day,  I feel I should point out the original script had a scene that explained how all modern technology -- especially computers -- was reverse engineered from the crashed alien fighter, but the scene was cut from the movie's final release.

That's a shame.

That still would've left his laptop as a plot hole, since it was his personal one instead of one of the Area 51 computers involved in testing.

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2 hours ago, ArielMT said:

That's a shame.

That still would've left his laptop as a plot hole, since it was his personal one instead of one of the Area 51 computers involved in testing.

Also I find it a massive issue with how a PowerBook 5300 (or thereabouts) instantly more or less take down a alien spaceship

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Characters with godlike powers being absent from key conflicts for no reason other than plot convenience.

Movies that take effort to explain the physics of some uber technology then spend the rest of the movie ignoring said physics.

Deus Ex Machina. Sometimes it can work. More often it doesn't.

Sequels that pull the franchise into a completely different direction than what originally made it good.

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"It's our only chance!"

2 hours ago, vexi fox said:

that sound bows make when they shoot an arrow. I have never heard an arrow whistle like that.

You need to use whistling head arrows.

I also hate excessively long action sequences with increasingly improbable stunts performed in rapid sequence. Unless it's a hong kong martial arts extravaganza, because there it's all part of the fun - but in a film that's supposed to be an action flick it just destroys willing suspension of disbelief and in a more light-hearted romp it tends to get in the way of the fun. Besides, directors are just using it as a crutch now. Half the time it doesn't really fit with the rest of the story, it's just put in because the Hollywood movie recipe says there should be an action sequence there.

There are exceptions to this rule. One can make a good, valid SFX scene provided that it's believable that the characters can do what they are doing (the 'spaceship falling apart' scene from Pitch Black) or the action happening is genuinely funny (the Wolf Pack chase scene from Storks) or if it's brief and used sparingly. Mostly though I just switch off and wait for the real movie to come back.

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7 hours ago, ArielMT said:

Computers that can upload viruses to alien computers, know that they're talking (successfully, mind you) to alien computers, and know that what they're uploading is a computer virus.

On that note, aliens that invade with flashier weapons than ours but despite the aliens being outnumbered a thousand to one, humanity re the "underdogs" because of "more advanced technology" (the concept of "more advanced technology" requires technology to be linear, something we only perceive because we only know of one species that uses technology)

3 hours ago, FlynnCoyote said:

Movies that take effort to explain the physics of some uber technology then spend the rest of the movie ignoring said physics.

Paranormal entities that pull out powers they clearly, blatantly didn't have a minute ago (in Mirrors the evil entity is stuck in a building, randomly tormenting night guards because its intended target is in a place with no mirrors and its pushing them to find her - then, suddenly, it can manifest through any reflective surface, and could've just skipped the first half of the movie and years or decades of backstory.)

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Movies that dedicate hefty portions of screen time to exposition rather than leaving things for the audience to figure out. Silent Hill Revelation does this. It would be a decent movie were it not for the scene where literally everything is spelled out for the audience by one of the characters.

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53 minutes ago, FlynnCoyote said:

Movies that dedicate hefty portions of screen time to exposition rather than leaving things for the audience to figure out. Silent Hill Revelation does this. It would be a decent movie were it not for the scene where literally everything is spelled out for the audience by one of the characters.

Oh f*** yes - they can't trust the audience to be able to figure out anything, it seems

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Characters with a set personality, usually negative in some way, who spend most of the movie with said personality and then change to a more positive and plot convenient outlook right at the critical moment. Bonus points if their original outlook was deliberately painted as objectively wrong for the duration and now that they're all happy crappy they're doing it "right."

 

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